Jose Reyes: Difference between revisions

Jose Reyes was some 12 year old [[Asperger's Syndrome|autistic]] kid who decided he was gonna bring a gun to school and get vengeance on all those meanie [[Bullying|bullies!!]]..............by [[Lulz|shooting every goddamn person in sight.]]

{{Ibrow|'''Top 25?'''|[[Lmao|LMFAO]] no}}

Jose was born on July 2, 2001 in some shithole in [[Nevada]]. He would later have 2 younger sisters whom he constantly had to babysit and probably annoyed the fuck out of him while his parents would go out and do [[Shit|shit]].

Reyes lived with his parents in [[Arizona|Arizona]] for some time when his [[Daddy|dad]] found some construction job, but then eventually they moved back to Nevada for some fucking reason. During his elementary school years, Jose started to develop symptoms of..........*GASP!* Whats this!?? [[Asperger's Syndrome|AUTISM!!!!]] He also started having behavioral issues such as [[Anger|anger]] when a [[Teacher|teacher]] asked if he needed any help with [[Srsly|assignments]] or storm out of the classroom going [[William Atchison|apeshit!]], crying about shit like changing situations, being [[Lonely| socially awkward af]], or being quiet as [[Hell|hell]]. (Are these last 2 problems reminding anybody of [[Adam Lanza|someone?]]) Because of these occurrences, Jose's school decided he was eligible for an [[Special Education|IEP]]. Around 5th grade, a [[Friends|friend]] of Jose died in a [[I Dunno LOL|"Gun related incident"]]. This greatly [[Depression|devastated]] Jose, and probably fucked him up too. Before Jose would begin his 6th grade year at Sparks Middle School, there was an IEP meeting held for him, to discuss how to handle the transition from elementary school to middle school. Eventually, they came up with the decision that a Special ED person (fuck, [[I Dunno LOL]]) would [[Kidnapping|walk him to each class]]. While attending Sparks Middle School, Jose would get picked on by some asshole kids. One kid mad fun of him for how Jose always stuttered. Another kid tripped him in the hallway, while others would [[Theft|not pay him back after he would loan them some money]], fucking hell even one kid called him a [[Michael Jackson|"Retarded Michael Jackson]]. Also during his time his behavioral problems worsened, he started getting [[U MAD|pissed off with students]] and [[Insane|talked and laughed with himself]] pretending he was an army general commanding his soldiers. While attending Sparks Jose would work at his dads restaurant were he would cook, however, because he was so [[Retard|autistic]], he would sometimes [[fuck]] up at his [[Job|job]], which resulted in his dad going batshit crazy over his [[Ass|ass]]. When he wasn't [[Secks|fucking around]] he would sometimes use the money he earned to buy toys from stores like [[Wal-Mart]] for his little sisters. GAY!

One day in 2012 after coming home from their shifts, Jose bugged his dad about a video game he wanted. This apparently made Jose's dad SO angry that Jose's dad [[Child abuse|decided to punch him 3 fucking times in the head and in one of his eyes!]] His dad was charged with child abuse and spent a night in [[Prison|jail]]. On October 18th 2013 Jose saw a psychologist where he was determined to have [[Captain Obvious|symptoms of Autism]] but for some dumbshit reason was [[WTF|not diagnosed with it]]. So Jose was given 10 MG's of the drug Prozac to take daily, along with some other unnamed medication. Jose also talked to the psychologist about how he was being bullied, and that there was an incident when one kid spilled some of his water on his pants in gym class where everyone began to laugh at his sorry ass. Jose's dad reportedly saw no changes in his behavior once he started taking the drugs, That's because he was planning a [[School Shooting]] MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

On October 21 2013, our hero Jose grabbed his dad's 9mm Ruger SR9C handgun and 2 magazines from [[Boi|behind a fucking cereal box in a kitchen cabinet.................GREAT PARENTING DAD!]] Then his [[Your Mom|mom]] gets him dressed in a school hoodie and some khaki shorts and then they head out for the car. Once Jose arrives at Sparks he's about to get out of the car when......HUH! OH NO! OUR HERO'S BEEN COMPROMISED! HIS MUM FOUND THE HANDGUN----actually his mom sees Jose's [[Fucktard|BB rifle sticking out of his backpack]]. Jose tries to [[Liar|lie]] to her saying his teacher needs it for a [[Fact|"Science project"]] But of course, the worried as fuck mom forces him to leave it in the car. HE BOUGHT FUCKING BB PELLETS WITH HIM TO USE FOR [[Jesus|CHRIST'S SAKE!]] Jose makes his way down to the basketball courts, school hasn't started yet and he walks to talk with a group of students. However, our hero finds himself in a shit situation once more, and gets made fun of by the group of degenerates for his speech problems. So like many autistic students would do, he pulls out the handgun and [[Lol|shoot's one of the kids square in the fucking shoulder]]. He fires more shots at people but can't aim for shit. He then walked around until he came across teacher Michael Landsberry. Landsberry, who was a war veteran, tried to get Jose to drop the weapon, in which Jose told him [[No|"No!"]] and to back away from him, but then our hero shoots him straight in the abdomen, somehow killing him instantly. A friend of Jose's comes and tries to help Landsberry, but Jose then points the gun at him. Jose's friend then begged for Jose not to shoot him, but, just so our hero can increase his K/D ratio, he then shoots his own friend in the stomach, but only [[Fail|wounding him]]. He then keeps walking around until he comes across a group of 5 students cowering in fear. Jose yells about how hes going to kill them, [[Pussy|but doesn't even do it!]] So Jose then does [[Moar|EVEN MORE]] walking around, just firing at random shit. He is even seen on CCTV footage trying to enter the school but the door was locked, when he could have done the [[Sandy Hook Elementary Massacre|fucking obvious.....]] Eventually his first magazine runs out of ammo so he reloads his gun, and has trouble [[Cock|cocking the gun slide]]. Once he cocks it, our hero decides to just [[An hero|end it]] by shooting himself in the head. He is noted as the youngest school shooter to commit suicide.

[[File:Jose Reyes band class.jpg|thumb|Jose in band class]]

[[File:Michael Landsberry.jpg|thumb|The pwn'd n00b]]

[[File:Jose's parents.jpg|thumb|"we fucked up"]]

 

|3/20 ''Was talked about for a few days, then forgotten''  

|2/20 ''Autistic Sperg-out''

! colspan="2" style="{{roundy|9px}}background-color:orange;box-shadow:0 3px 6px yellow;" | <big>Total score: 15/100 ('''F-''')</big>