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Korea: Difference between revisions
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==Background== | ==Background== | ||
[[Image:Koreanzerglings.jpg|thumb|left|ZERG RUSH!]] | [[Image:Koreanzerglings.jpg|thumb|left|ZERG RUSH!]] | ||
[[File:Ahotkoreanman.jpg|thumb|left|A typical korean man]] | |||
Once upon a time, Japan surprise buttsexed China, and '''''KOREA''''' is the prolapsed colon that resulted. During [[100 years ago|the 1950s]] Korea was the site of some epic [[RL drama]], when [[Lulz|war]] broke out between the North and South due to a lack of good ''[[Starcraft]]'' servers. After repeated [[Rape|defeats]], the South asked the [[America]]ns for help, in response the Americans and pretty much the rest of the world proceeded to [[Pwn|invade and drive back]] the North all the way to the Chinese border. However, more drama was to be begotten when paranoid chink commies, most armed with little more than their microscopic ding dongs, went apeshit and launched a surprise [[Raid|offensive]] on the UN armies, who, after some serious anal raping, then agreed to a [[GG|ceasefire]]. The [[Korean War]] initiated the proud American tradition of [[Freedom|bombing the shit out of other countries in order to save them]], and introduced the world to the noble Chinese tradition of rounding up a bunch of illiterate [[Mexicans|peasant]]s, giving them a couple of twigs, and forcing them into heroic, [[an hero|suicidal]] "[[Zerg rush|human wave]]" attacks. The border of North and South Korea hasn't changed since, with both sides engaging in a [[flame war|stand-off]]. | Once upon a time, Japan surprise buttsexed China, and '''''KOREA''''' is the prolapsed colon that resulted. During [[100 years ago|the 1950s]] Korea was the site of some epic [[RL drama]], when [[Lulz|war]] broke out between the North and South due to a lack of good ''[[Starcraft]]'' servers. After repeated [[Rape|defeats]], the South asked the [[America]]ns for help, in response the Americans and pretty much the rest of the world proceeded to [[Pwn|invade and drive back]] the North all the way to the Chinese border. However, more drama was to be begotten when paranoid chink commies, most armed with little more than their microscopic ding dongs, went apeshit and launched a surprise [[Raid|offensive]] on the UN armies, who, after some serious anal raping, then agreed to a [[GG|ceasefire]]. The [[Korean War]] initiated the proud American tradition of [[Freedom|bombing the shit out of other countries in order to save them]], and introduced the world to the noble Chinese tradition of rounding up a bunch of illiterate [[Mexicans|peasant]]s, giving them a couple of twigs, and forcing them into heroic, [[an hero|suicidal]] "[[Zerg rush|human wave]]" attacks. The border of North and South Korea hasn't changed since, with both sides engaging in a [[flame war|stand-off]]. | ||
There are a few Koreans in Japan, and the Japanese there, practicing exceedingly high standards concerning racial purity, treat them as [[niggers]]. | There are a few Koreans in Japan, and the Japanese there, practicing exceedingly high standards concerning racial purity, treat them as [[niggers]].Also, the chasm between Western and Eastern part of Korea is high, as they try not to taint their royal [[Azn]] blood with niggers, white devils, or other Azns in Korea. | ||
==Foods/Customs== | |||
Korean dishes include boiled grasses, leaves, boiled dogs, boiled cows; anything that is boiled and cooked with red-pepper can be Korean. While some love Korean food, typical Korean dish, which consists of Kimchi, Radish-Kimchi, White-Kimchi, more Kimchi, and rice, is not edible to humans, except for maybe hungry people that live in Africa. The legend actually has it that koreans drip kimchi when they bleed. | |||
Koreans have very odd custom of calling anyone older "hyung/oppa/nuna", which means older brother or older sister. As a result, in many case of Korean relationships, people say "my sister/brother" when they are having sex, which kind of explains why Japs(that came from Koreans) are obsessed with incest hentai. But Koreans don't have to do that since Korean couples engage in daily incest role play. Due to possible broken DNA resulting from incestuous relationships, we can still confirm that Koreans are very proud of their Korean heritage(which probably consists of copying other heritages.) | |||
Most of the students in Korea are virgins, preparing to become great honorary [[Azn]] wizard. Their sports of choice include memorizing useless crap, watching K-pop when they are not sleeping, watching Japanese porn and hating Japs at possibly at the same time, and masturbating with their well plagiarized achievements. Although Koreans naturally suck at sports, they are better than any other ethnicity at talking about sports. | |||
Recently Korean government banned pornography because Korean women could not stand the sight of women online that had bigger boobs and asses than them,(which is practically everyone in the world); however, Korean virgin males did not react because they were shamed of having [[Azn]] dicks. | |||
Korean men like to brag about mandatory military service, which can best be likened to Auschwitz, except that it is worse because you would have to see Korean fags talk all day about K-pop and eat kimchi all day. Historians claim that faggotry practiced among Koreans stem from long history of slavery.(No, this is actually serious, slaves made up 50% of the population in the last Chosun dynasty of Korea). Naturally, Koreans are [[nigger]] asians; however, particular faggotry is practiced only among Korean themselves because people from other race actually stand up for themselves and beat the shit out of anyone who does it. | |||
In their long shitty history, (imagine the never-ending series of [[sharknado]] movies), there have been no Korean historical figures that influenced the world in a positive manner; however, King Sejong and Lee-Soon-Shin are famous to test-makers in the US for making frequent appearances in the essay section of the SAT. Believe it or not, some conspiracy theories claim that [[Hitler]] had a Korean ancestry. | |||
== Simplified == | == Simplified == | ||
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[[Best Korea|North Korea]]: The pimps with the nukes. <br/> | [[Best Korea|North Korea]]: The pimps with the nukes. <br/> | ||
[[Good Korea|South Korea]]: The players with the shitty tech. | [[Good Korea|South Korea]]: The players with the shitty tech. | ||
[[File:KoreanBDSMWhore.jpg|thumb|right|Americans brutally tortured Korean Civilians during the Korea War in both Koreas]] | |||
According to [[Conservative|Samuel Huntington]] the whole idea is for Good Korea to inherit Evil Korea's Nukes after they all starve, thus joining the Nuclear Club, guilt-free. | According to [[Conservative|Samuel Huntington]] the whole idea is for Good Korea to inherit Evil Korea's Nukes after they all starve, thus joining the Nuclear Club, guilt-free. | ||
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# Tell them that most Korean words come from China. | # Tell them that most Korean words come from China. | ||
# Ask them how many times Korea has been invaded. | # Ask them how many times Korea has been invaded. | ||
# Call them "gook," "chink," "Chinese," or "panface." | # Call them "gook," "chink," "Chinese," or "panface." (Obviously this is not trolling. Koreans will become [[Cho Seung Hui]]) | ||
# Tell a Korean girl she'd look so much better with an eye job. | # Tell a Korean girl she'd look so much better with an eye job. | ||
# Tell them about your trip to Asia, and make sure to say that the Korean whores were the best. | # Tell them about your trip to Asia, and make sure to say that the Korean whores were the best. | ||
# Tell a Korean man that your girlfriend is Korean. | # Tell a Korean man that your girlfriend is Korean. | ||
# Ask if dog tastes good. | # Ask if dog tastes good. | ||
# Inform a Korean man that usually, when a Korean girl goes to college she can't get enough nigger dick. | # Inform a Korean man that usually, when a Korean girl goes to college she can't get enough nigger dick. | ||
# Tell a Korean man that his wife wasn't a virgin, she had hymen replacement surgery. Say that she was your girlfriend, during which time you fucked her as much as possible, and he's lucky to have such a sweet piece of ass. | # Tell a Korean man that his wife wasn't a virgin, she had hymen replacement surgery. Say that she was your girlfriend, during which time you fucked her as much as possible, and he's lucky to have such a sweet piece of ass. | ||
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# Tell them how Korea has [[truth|spent its entire history being the bitch of either China, Japan, or the USA]]. | # Tell them how Korea has [[truth|spent its entire history being the bitch of either China, Japan, or the USA]]. | ||
# Talk to them in Japanese and expect them to understand you completely. | # Talk to them in Japanese and expect them to understand you completely. | ||
Be careful; they often carry knives. | Be careful; they often carry knives. | ||
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# You mean nothing to us...except for Blizzard. | # You mean nothing to us...except for Blizzard. | ||
# KKKKIIILLLL NNNNOOOORRRRTTTTHHH KOOORREEEAAAAA | # KKKKIIILLLL NNNNOOOORRRRTTTTHHH KOOORREEEAAAAA | ||
# But After the 2010s, South Korean sentiment toward the United States has come to favor the United States, with the exception of a few anti-Americans. | |||
<center>[[Image:Boiled alive dogs asians.jpg|thumb|center|600px|Fun fact: koreans love dog meat, hell, [[DO IT FAGGOT|you can even taste one in a korean restaurant!]]]]</center> | |||
== Brutally True Facts About Koreans == | == Brutally True Facts About Koreans == | ||
[[File:Average Penis Size Throughout the World.jpg|thumb|Korean men have the smallest dicks in the world]] | |||
# They [[Fact|smell.]] | # They [[Fact|smell.]] | ||
# | # North Koreans are mind-fucked and think their country is full of purity thanks to their grorious reader. | ||
# Lower-class Koreans are extremely hot-headed, any words that sounds like an insult towards them and they will punch you in the face with no remorse. | # Lower-class Koreans are extremely hot-headed, any words that sounds like an insult towards them and they will punch you in the face with no remorse. | ||
# Koreans are either people that are mentioned above, or SAT nerds with giant glasses and loads of SAT-prep books stacking in their room just so they can try and get into Harvard, but usually end up going to some school for rich Korean failures like Bucknell. | # Koreans are either people that are mentioned above, or SAT nerds with giant glasses and loads of SAT-prep books stacking in their room just so they can try and get into Harvard, but usually end up going to some school for rich Korean failures like Bucknell. | ||
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# Koreans actually believe Japanese Samurai originated from Korean [[Bullshit|Samurang]]. | # Koreans actually believe Japanese Samurai originated from Korean [[Bullshit|Samurang]]. | ||
# On the rare occasion a Korean immigrant converses with someone of a different ethnicity, they'll go on and on about how great their home country is, despite having jumped at the chance to move to the nation they currently live in. | # On the rare occasion a Korean immigrant converses with someone of a different ethnicity, they'll go on and on about how great their home country is, despite having jumped at the chance to move to the nation they currently live in. | ||
# [[ | # [[Kpop]] is used to hide their country's truth, just to only get their attention and its good images. They get so butthurt whenever someone (doesn't need to be anti-sentimental or so) exposes them into complete misery. | ||
# Their education is consistent of | # Their education is consistent of Hangul, and about the fucking island of Dokdo (Oh scratch that, Dokdo isn't even their land! LOL, it was Takeshima!) | ||
# Many Koreans are hard-core evangelical Christians, and will openly discuss religion anywhere, anytime. Do not be surprised if a Korean sitting next to you on the bus asks you if you have accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. If you say, "no," he will proceed to give you a sermon, telling you that you will certainly go to hell. If you try to get away from him, he will follow you. | # Many Koreans, especially the ones in America, are hard-core evangelical Christians, and will openly discuss religion anywhere, anytime. Do not be surprised if a Korean sitting next to you on the bus asks you if you have accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. If you say, "no," he will proceed to give you a sermon, telling you that you will certainly go to hell. If you try to get away from him, he will follow you. | ||
# You should be glad you're not a [[Good Korea|South Korean]] citizen, because all male citizens are required to serve 2 years in the military, which is basically worthless since they're gonna suck America's cock for help again once there is a war. | # You should be glad you're not a [[Good Korea|South Korean]] citizen, because all male citizens are required to serve 2 years in the military, which is basically worthless since they're gonna suck America's cock for help again once there is a war. Most of their time is spent sucking their CO's cocks to not get beaten up and pulling out weeds with their bare hands while they're paid $100 a month to do so, which just shows that they're only meat shields to buy time for good old 'Murican freedom where the women are exempt from this meaningless conscription. | ||
# Be cautious of any Koreans near you, [[Cho Seung-Hui|for one of them might want to go for a high score and blow up a college near you]]. | # Be cautious of any Koreans near you, [[Cho Seung-Hui|for one of them might want to go for a high score and blow up a college near you]]. | ||
# [[Starcraft| | # Any game from [[Starcraft|Blizzard]], [[League Of Legends|Riot]], or Nexon is just like oxygen for the Koreans, for if they stop playing it, they will die; [[World of Warcraft|they're much more important than their babies]]. | ||
# Koreans think their culture is unique, but it's basically a rip-off mix between [[Japan]] and [[China]]. | # Koreans think their culture is unique, but it's basically a rip-off mix between [[Japan]] and [[China]]. | ||
# [[Fact|Koreans are much uglier and their eyes are much slantier]] than their [[Azn|Asian]] neighbors, that's why plastic surgery is so popular in Korea. Their faces are also flat, which is why they are called "panfaces." | # [[Fact|Koreans are much uglier and their eyes are much slantier]] than their [[Azn|Asian]] neighbors, that's why plastic surgery is so popular in Korea. Their faces are also flat, which is why they are called "panfaces." | ||
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# Korean women will stab to death their entire families for just a mere whiff of some white cock. | # Korean women will stab to death their entire families for just a mere whiff of some white cock. | ||
# They have nothing of their own. No tradition, but just copying others for the lulz and claiming it as a Korean invention. | # They have nothing of their own. No tradition, but just copying others for the lulz and claiming it as a Korean invention. | ||
# Had to invent the [[mukbang]] because half the population are friendless [[loser]]s. | |||
== | ==Korean Videos== | ||
[[ | Most of them are shit nobody cares about, like Kim Jong-Il's penis size or [[Gay|faburous Korean history]], and the rikes. Enjoy these videos brought to you by the '''Korean Intelligence Agency'''. | ||
{|style="margin:0 auto" | |||
{{ | |{{frame|{{videoframe|koreavideos|background-color:#a5a5a5|font-weight:bold | ||
|<youtube>m_-PIpYpIfQ</youtube><br /><center>'''The Korean National Anthem.'''</center> | |||
</center> | |<youtube>Ptyzc4BQliY</youtube><br /><center></center> | ||
|<youtube>xXxvsShaAoA</youtube><br /><center></center> | |||
|<youtube>9bZkp7q19f0</youtube><br /><center>'''This is what Gay Korea is best known for.'''</center>}}|border=#a5a5a5|background=#a5a5a5}} | |||
|} | |||
==Famous Gooks== | ==Famous Gooks== | ||
* [[Cho Seung Hui]] | * [[Cho Seung Hui]] | ||
* Kim | * [[Kim il sung]] | ||
* [[Kim Jong Il]] | * [[Kim Jong Il]] | ||
* [[Chan Ho Park|Park Chan Ho]] | * [[Chan Ho Park|Park Chan Ho]] | ||
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{{race}} | {{race}} | ||
{{Korea}} | |||
{{4chanarchive|24618024|I'M KOREAN}} | {{4chanarchive|24618024|I'M KOREAN}} | ||