Encyclopedia Dramatica:Article of the Now/November 28, 2023

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Cthulhu



Cthulhu is a badass alien tentacle-monster God worshiped by the Japanese as well as an alleged presidential candidate. It is a well-known and established scientific fact that Cthulhu is actually a predecessor to its newer evolved form the Flying Spaghetti Monster. An ancient prophecy about Cthulhu, written in an ancient form of leetspeak says:

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wagn'nagl fhtagn.


Translation: In his house in R'lyeh dead Cthulhu waits dreaming. To further explicate the matter: deep beneath the Pacific waves, Cthulhu lies entombed in his house in R'lyeh, dead but dreaming. When the stars become right, the island city of R'lyeh will rise above the waves and Cthulhu will stride the surface once more, making the Earth his plaything as the Old Ones return, wiping humanity off the face of the planet in an eldritch orgy of destruction in one fell swoop. Every Lovecraft nerd is familiar with his half-brother, Hastur, who he hates so much. (Probably because his influence is spread all over our Cthulhu page)



(( He's More Powerful Than Santa, The Easter Bunny, The Colossal Land Hydra And The Giant Spaghetti Monster Times 2 ))


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