Rei saru
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This page has potential but it needs a lot of work. It could benefit from pictures and drama and vodka, oh my. Discuss edits that might add to the lulz on this article's talk page. |
rei_saru is a LiveJournal user who is fat and unhappy about his life. He had a confirmed non-Syphilis infection recently.
He is a raging alcoholic and, astonishingly, a big fat whore. He sucks at least 100 cocks in public, regularly, and rumor has it, he survives on a diet of fast food, sperm, vodka and klonopin.
Rei_Saru's History as a Man Slut
rei_saru's status as a whore was confirmed last Thursday when former Livejournal user mizznizznichael posted a tl;dr story over some gay love.
WARNING-DRAMA SATURATED POST This is my last LJ post and it includes bridge burning, insult and injury. I did something, something horribly detestable to people I care about. I post this here because I want to share my side of the story and if none of them will hear it, everyone will. I really fucked up, so read on while I air my dirty laundry.
Cast of Characters:
- The Fabulously Fucked Up: Me mizznizznichael
- The Jealous Ex-lover: Michael michaeldowling
- The Icy Ex-lover: Jim naughtyboysf
- The Young Red-headed Tart: Chris cj_shahi
- "'The Condescending Ass: "'Ray"' rei_saru
- The Young Ex-Football Player: J (not on LJ)
As you all may or may not know, I was dating michaeldowling and naughtyboysf for about six months. Two great guys, but in the end, things didn't work out for us as a 3-some.
So, it had been about a month since we split when I received a new friend request on LJ from cj_shahi. I thought he was cute and I messaged him. Not knowing who he actually was, I made him some icons because I didn't like the ones he had. We became friends online and it was just a matter of time until I found out he actually worked with naughtyboysf, in fact, cj_shahi was naughtyboysf's subordinate at work. Furthermore, cj_shahi is only 20 years of age. Now, I don't usually involve myself with guys younger than me, but there was something about him. He knew my hesitation to meet him due to the fact that he works with naughtyboysf. He even slept with rei_saru who gave him some sort of non-syphilis infection. I was SO not into that. Against my better judgment, I was interested and kept talking to him.
cj_shahi and I shared many stories and he seemed pretty cool. But underneath it all, I knew he was here to teach me something. What that was, I wasn't exactly sure yet.
One morning, after going out with some friends up in the city, I called cj_shahi to see if he was down to hang out. He was, so I ventured over to his new place around 10:30am. He was still in bed. We snuggled and cuddled and it was good times. We messed around and even though his cock was less than average, I was still into him. While we fucked around, I urged cj_shahi to bite me. Not so much because I liked it, but because days before, I had met a 20y/o ex football player who gave me a couple bruises. I let cj_shahi think he had given them to me. cj_shahi was a pussy at first, but I coached him a bit and he got better. After those two experiences I discovered that boys always need coaching. We played this whole "daddy and boy" thing, even though he is only 5 years younger. Silly, right? But it was kinda fun. I liked to call him a "Pretty Boy". He played along well enough. Bitch knows how to whimper and was begging for this dick (can you blame him?). He never got it. We had a pretty good time, or so I thought. He later made it out to be like he wasn't really into me or something like that when he confessed his side of the story to naughtyboysf. I have a feeling some details may have been omitted on cj_shahi's part.
I really liked cj_shahi, but I think he got the wrong idea about me and in turn, fed those wrong ideas to others. Even though it may not be relevant to them now, I feel I must say my piece. A relationship would have been nice, but there were many factors working against it. The most important factor is time. I had split from michaeldowling and naughtyboysf only a month prior. I was definitely not in the right place for a relationship then, nor am I now. Another of the reasons I broke up with michaeldowling and naughtyboysf was commute. They live in SF and I live in SJ. Even though it is only a 50 mile drive, it was a long distance relationship. These things almost never work. Also, if I need my man, I need him when I need him, not an hour from then when he gets to me from driving all that way. Finally, the age factor. Everyone knows that youth is fickle. Hell, I still am sometimes. I have learned from all of my older friends in relationships with younger guys (guys in their late, late teens or early 20s) that the relationships are usually unstable because of the needs and wants of youth. Ultimately, I knew I could not have a relationship with cj_shahi.
Two days after, cj_shahi tells me he now has a new boyfriend and that we cannot see each other again in a sexual capacity. I thought it a little quick, but it was his decision and hopefully a good one.
A few days later, I talked to michaeldowling and naughtyboysf contacted me to ask questions about the bruises they had seen in photos from a pool party and to try to "make friendly" with me. They insisted that friends tell each other everything, even swap sex stories. I thought, "Sure, regular friends do, but not friends with pasts," but I caved. So, michaeldowling insists that I read this novel of a LJ post (like this one) about how some couple came over and dominated them and all this. It kinda made me nauseous because I didn't really want to read it. This sort of "sharing" seemed more like "rubbing it in my face", but I choked it down. While reading and chatting, I made a fatal error and called cj_shahi all late-nite style and asked him if I should tell michaeldowling and naughtyboysf about our encounter. He said that they would find out eventually anyway, but I went ahead and made another mistake anyway. I told michaeldowling my story. but I made up sort of a hybrid lie. I told michaeldowling the story of the 20y/o ex football player. And it is true that the ex-football player gave me bruises, but so did cj_shahi. I told michaeldowling a story about the bruises, just not the one I thought I wanted them to hear because I was already ashamed of myself. Fast forward to Thursday (today). cj_shahi tells naughtyboysf, who in turn tells michaeldowling. michaeldowling and naughtyboysf write scathing emails to me. I'll spare you the details unless you want them, in which case, ask me. I don't want to hide this at all. It should be public knowledge so that everyone can know what I am actually capable of and so their hearts can feel pity for me and my existence than anything. I love a good show and no one should be deprived of this one.
cj_shahi speculated that he might be here to teach me how to be more honest and straight forward. I agreed with him since I have a fault with that. He did teach me to be straight forward and honest. I can honestly say I have learned my lesson and although the cost was extremely high, I am grateful to everyone. Except rei_saru. michaeldowling and naughtyboysf can be grateful to him and they can go back to being friends. I know michaeldowling and naughtyboysf never stopped, even though they pretended to while we were dating. But still, hatred by association is a sweet thing to do in my book. Go on rei_saru, tell them '"I told you so."'
So there you have it, ladies and gents! I am a royal asshole and should have a Snickers shoved down my throat immediately. I accept any and all consequences and will accept absolutely no excuses.
If you have made it this far, know that this blog will be deleted by Saturday. I concede this part of the internet to you, my moral superiors.
See Also