Screamo
Screamo, also known as post-hardcore, is a type of screechy ass music from emo usually played by hipsters, emos, pogo-fags and is basically complete noise that rapes yo ears in front of ya. The music has screechy and annoying ass screaming that jacks off your ears.
How to Make a Screamo Band
- Find at least one emo kid in the band
- Get a cracker to scream in the mic like he is getting castrated
- Guitar lines should ripoff emo bands
- Make EMOtional lyrics
- Record music in a cave or in a trash can
- Wear ear plugs in case the music smacks up your ears
- Drink MOAR redbull
- Write about your GF breaking up with you last Thursday
- Make sure your vocals sound possibly like you're screaming in agony. Your face must reflect that as well. See the links below for some examples.
- If you're the vocalist and are a cunt/girl then put a chainsaw up your vagina if you have trouble screaming
- If you also wanna often sing, then just impersonate Gerard Way, Guy Picciotto, Bert McCracken, Craig Mabbitt, etc
- If you're playing for a skramz band, become a terrorist and record you bombing a city and making people shriek in your music.
- Be a hipster or a vegan
- While you make the awful screaming noises in performances, you must put one foot up on an elevated surface with the knee bent at a 90-degree angle. All screamo bands have a Wikipedia article picture where the vocalist does this. Don't know what this pose looks like, go to https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Of_Mice_%26_Men_(band) or https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caleb_Shomo or https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beartooth and you will see this fuckingly retarded pose.
Lyrics
The lyrics in screamo usually just talk about how you're the destruction of the relationship with some whore, otherwise write about your EMOtionally retarded feelings, getting drunk and high to ease your pain, ripping off Romeo and Juliet with modern English, and be sure to do whatever the fucking shit any before screamo band does.
Lyric examples
- GOD DAMMIT!!! AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!! I broke the relationship!
- GAWD VAGINA!!!! MY BF CHEATED ON ME AND FUCKED ANOTHER KUNT!
- AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAEEEEEE!!
- LOOK AT MY FACE!
- YYEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAH I MISS U YYUYEEEEHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA I MISS U
- EXCUSE ME EVERYONE! I WANT ATTENTION! Alright watch how tough I am! I will blow my brains out! CUZ I CAN HANDLE PAIN!
- I LOVE U I WANNA SHOVE MY COCK UP URANUS
- BLOOD IS ON MY STOMACH, YOU KILLED MY LOVE YOU CUNT I WILL TEACH U because I am a teacher at a torture chamber
Eras and Styles
1990s
Some band who named themselves after a drug named Heroin decided to gather powerviolence and h@rdcord gay edge fans to play emo music, so they decided to record in a trash can of cum smeared on the walls, they also became terrorists and decided to bomb cities which is why when you hear their music they sound like they are dying on 9/11. The singer knew how to scream so shrieky because he got castrated as a little one because he was some kike who had some retard try to perform circumcism but ended up castrating him accidentally. Many screamo bands were tagged as skramz by this time by people who wereTOO MUCH OF A FUCKIN RETARD TO SPELL "SCRAMS" RIGHT. Most bands consisted of emos and h@rdc0red kids who dressed like geeks and hipsters with jeans, sweater vests, t shirts and huge fucking glasses that indiefags wear today. Other nerd bands playing this noise were Orchid, Pg 99, Circle Takes the Square and Neil Perry.
Song Structure of Skramz
- Soft guitars and quietness
- Vocals come
- Guitars distort
- Drummer is on redbull while his ass gets tickled
- YAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHYYYAYAHAHAHHEEEEEEHHAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!
- ALLAH UAKBAR! BOOMBOOM BOOM WE'RE FUCKIN MUZZIES
- Song ends, 30-90 seconds of noise
2000s
Nowadays emo bands with a screamo sound now dress the today emo image and now sing because they want to sellout and sound MOAR radio-friendly. Bands like Thursday and Funeral for a Friend now make a gayer version of screamo and weren't nerds but just emofags you see today. But then shittier bands come out.
Late 2000s/2010s
Now most bands overuse the BREAKDOWNS CHUGGA CHUGGA which now Asking Alexandria, A Day to Remember, Eyes Set to Kill and other bands do. They have to jack off to men in tight pants, pogo-dance and do shrieky screams, growls from their dog getting its anus prepared, and singing like a boy band. After these bands came, now there are a bunch of poseur bands out there and now the music is confused with heavy metal. Worse yet, an entire worldwide festival known as Warped Tour has come to power and succeeded in flooding entire amphitheatres and stadiums with jizz from obese fangirls and faggot emo boys.
How to Sound Like Newer Screamo
- Riff
- YEEEEDEAAAAAAAAHDHDHDHDDHDH!!!!!
- Friendly singing like One Erection
- YEAAAAH
- Singing that sounds extremely feminine
- GROWL OH! BREAKDOWN 000000000000
- SINGING AND SCREAMING
- YOU GOT MONEY YOU FUGGIN KIKE!$$$$$
POP IS GAY AND IS SO EASY. Our screamo tab we made:00000000000000000000000000
Bands Tagged as Screamo
- Dance Gavin Dance - who references female serial killers and shitty NES movie adaptations in their songs?
- Sleeping with Sirens - their vocalist literally cries as the screams come out of his mouth. The clean parts sound extremely feminine too. Girls love this guy.
- Pierce the Veil - again, it's 16-year-old girl eye candy.
- Fugazi - nothing to see here
- Rites of Spring - you know what's a rite of passage? Destroying a screamo CD!
- Hawthorne Heights - they were influenced by non-screamo music from the 1990s, but still sound gay.
- Escape the Fate - they ripped off the Hot for Teacher music video! Bonus points: one of their members is a Islam.
- Every Time I Die - the vocalist Keith Buckley died of AIDS. One would think he got HIV by fucking too many groupies, but we personally think he was a faggot.
- Scary Kids Scaring Kids - they broke up! Haha!
- Snapcase - Wikipedia doesn't know whether to classify them as punk or post-hardcore (screamo), but they perform at the dreaded Warped Tour, which makes them fit in this article.
- Set Your Goals - our goal is to completely wipe out all music with screaming in it by 2020.
- A Skylit Drive - just like everyone who lives in the overrated cesspool known as California, these people show off about living there and act like it's the greatest thing since sliced bread.
- Sparks the Rescue - they love getting horny at the hospital.
- Hatebreed - they claim to have been inspired by hardcore punk, which we don't believe.
- Red Jumpsuit Apparatus - a screamo band that actually encourages guys to treat women properly. Go figure.
- Senses Fail - typical emo crap.
- Area 11 - you idiots, you are not Japan!
- The Used - this is probably the only screamo band that has songs that get played at high school dances.
- Finch - their drummer got an IRL banhammer for fraud. As corrupt as the US criminal justice system is, these jerks deserved a harsh punishment for making such shitty god-awful music.
- It Prevails - no one has ever heard of this band
- Devil Wears Prada - they like to trick death metal bands into opening for them.
- Still Remains - the system is corrupt!
- Alesana - more underground shit
- 30 seconds to Mars - they're classified as alternative rock, but they use lots of screamo elements. It's ironic how the vocalist Jared Leto is an actor who played Why So Serious? in Suicide Squad and starred in some other obscure films no one has heard of.
- Boysetsfire - more crap no one knows
- alexisonfire - what it is with screamo bands and compound words?
- I Set my Friends on Fire - what is it with screamo bands and fire?
- Silverstein - they like to pretend to be artistic and deep.
- You Me at 6 - this band has an extremely annoying fanbase.
- Story of the Year - amazingly, they often censor their songs to cut out the high-pitched shrieking.
- Blessthefall - it will be a blessed day when they fall into hell!
- Chiodos - one of the earliest examples of modern screamo, formed prior to 9/11.
- A Day to Remember - they have by far the largest fanbase and cult following of any screamo band, but receive no criticism. Until now! Muahahahaha!
- Blood on the Dance Floor - they can be referred to as "popcore".
- Circle 7 - they're so underground and obscure that no one knows them outside of this article. Wouldn't it be great if all screamo music were like this?
- 1,000 Dead rabbits - a mix of screamo, deathcore, and NES music.
- Black Veil Brides - these sick fucks simulate school shootings in their music videos! IDK whether to cringe or laugh my ass off.
- Deuce - can't tell whether screamo or alternative rock.
- The Fall of Troy - these people need to be locked up!
- Abandon all Ships more electronic garbage.
- Envy - Japanese bananas who shockingly don’t hate Americunts, but only because they are gay lovers with the American screamo band Thursday.
How to troll screamo fans
- When they ask you to scream, do a low death growl.
- Tell them music with screaming in it is not real music
- Tell them listening to the Black Veil Brides song "Knives and Pens" will turn them into a violent psychopath.
- Call them wimpy attention whores.
- Tell them ADTR is for preppy douchebags.
- Go to a Sleeping with Sirens concert and shout "You sing like a little girl!" at the vocalist.
- Go to a Pierce the Veil concert and shout "BEANER!" or "SPIC!" at the band.
- Go to an Escape the Fate concert and shout "Allahu Ackbar!!"
- Listen to the Scary Kids Scaring Kids song "Watch me Bleed" and keep a straight face and don't cry.
- Remind them that a contestant was rejected from American Idol for doing a screamo song in his audition.
- Buy them a pair of normal-fitting pants.
- Use their eyeliner and hair dye without permission.
- Say Escape the Fate and Pierce the Veil didn't deserve to open for 5 Finger Death Punch.
- Cut off all their hair.
- Say Linkin Park is hardcore.
- Refuse to play the Senses Fail song "Can't be Saved" in Guitar Hero 3.
- Make fun of Keith Buckley's death.
- Ask them how often they cut themselves.
- Send them a link to the SammyClassicSonicFan video "Rant Against the Sonic Fanbase". This kid makes some very screamo-esque noises in that video.
- Tell them all emo and scene kids are fags.
- Tell them Black Flag revolutionised the screaming technique.
Videos
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See Also
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