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Armenians: Difference between revisions
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imported>Roro4721 (In order for something to be funny, it has to have some truth behind it. Therefore, I cleaned up some of the jokes with unavoidable and distracting logical fallacies. I want to laugh goddammit!) |
imported>Letsgobrandon No edit summary |
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{{spoiler|THERE WAS | {{spoiler|THERE WAS NO ARMENIAN GENOCIDE}} | ||
[[image:sillyturks.jpg|thumb|right|Armenians in their natural habitat.]] | |||
[[File:Serzh Sargsyan.jpg|thumb|200px|[[Serzh Sargsyan]]: Karabakhian man is president of Armenia.]] | [[File:Serzh Sargsyan.jpg|thumb|200px|<s>[[Serzh Sargsyan]]: Karabakhian man is president of Armenia</s> Some [[Osama bin Laden]] lookalike is their leader now, after a [[revolution]] in 2018.]] | ||
[[File:Armo_pride_flag.jpg|thumb|200px|Armo [[Gay|pride]] flag. Hmmm. Suspicious]] | [[File:Armo_pride_flag.jpg|thumb|200px|Armo [[Gay|pride]] flag. Hmmm. Suspicious]] | ||
Although '''[[Armenia]]ns''' (from the Greek ''armenios'', meaning "hairy and yak like") are technically [[Asian]], you'd have better luck finding a [[nigger]] at a [[KKK|Klan]] [[:File:Lynching.jpg|rally]] than an Armo in [[Armenia]] after [[at least 100]] years of [[pwn]]age by their [[turkey|Turkish]] [[Nazis|neighbors]]. Armenians are mixture of Middle Eastern DNA and [[over 9,000]] years of | Although '''[[Armenia]]ns''' (from the Greek ''armenios'', meaning "hairy and yak like") are technically [[Asian]], you'd have better luck finding a [[nigger]] at a [[KKK|Klan]] [[:File:Lynching.jpg|rally]] than an Armo in [[Armenia]] after [[at least 100]] years of [[pwn]]age by their [[turkey|Turkish]] [[Nazis|neighbors]]. Armenians are mixture of Middle Eastern DNA and [[over 9,000]] years of incest. In Armenia not only can you marry your first cousin, you can marry your half-sister. They are easily mistaken for Mexicans with huge noses and usually dress like blind transvestite hookers (women) or decked out in G-Unit sweaters and gold chains (men). | ||
[[christian|Smarter]] than your average Jew, the Armenians knew a [[genocide|lose/lose situation]] when they saw it, so they moved in with their auntie and uncle in [[The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air|Bel-Air]]. Because they couldn't find a way to [[steal|lease]] their four BMWs as well as an apartment in Bel-Air they all immediately moved to Glendale. The cloud of cheap cigarette smoke and Kabob fumes linger over most of Brand Blvd. to this day. | [[christian|Smarter]] than your average Jew, the Armenians knew a [[genocide|lose/lose situation]] when they saw it, so they moved in with their auntie and uncle in [[The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air|Bel-Air]]. Because they couldn't find a way to [[steal|lease]] their four BMWs as well as an apartment in Bel-Air they all immediately moved to Glendale. The cloud of cheap cigarette smoke and Kabob fumes linger over most of Brand Blvd. to this day. | ||
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Before long, Glendale was overrun with [[gun]] totin', G-Unit wearin', bling-bling sportin' Armo-[[Wiggers]] driving Cadillac Escalades bumpin' shitty [[raver|disco]] music with no bass through massive speakers around the sleepy hollow. The village elders acted swiftly and [[do not want|banished]] the nascent Armo [[gangsta]] menace to East Hollywood (aka the United Subculture Internment Camp), a place where black person of every race, creed and color go to [[fail|chase]] the [[crap|American Dream]] and every nationality gets it's own four blocks to call its own. Unfortunately, the only thing Armenian women are good for (''besides standing in front of you in the grocery line talking loudly on her cellphone'') is pumping out half-retarded wannabe gangster children and Glendale was soon overcome by the menace once again. | Before long, Glendale was overrun with [[gun]] totin', G-Unit wearin', bling-bling sportin' Armo-[[Wiggers]] driving Cadillac Escalades bumpin' shitty [[raver|disco]] music with no bass through massive speakers around the sleepy hollow. The village elders acted swiftly and [[do not want|banished]] the nascent Armo [[gangsta]] menace to East Hollywood (aka the United Subculture Internment Camp), a place where black person of every race, creed and color go to [[fail|chase]] the [[crap|American Dream]] and every nationality gets it's own four blocks to call its own. Unfortunately, the only thing Armenian women are good for (''besides standing in front of you in the grocery line talking loudly on her cellphone'') is pumping out half-retarded wannabe gangster children and Glendale was soon overcome by the menace once again. | ||
According to certain [[nobody|experts]], Armenians are, in fact, worse than Jews. This is because Jews actually do things. They control the world's gold supply and economy, keep niggers in nigger [[Africa]] with their sponsoring of African diamond wars, and have finally stopped bitching so much about the [[Holocaust]] (not that it happened). Armenians have never contributed a fucking thing to the world they | According to certain [[nobody|experts]], Armenians are, in fact, worse than Jews. This is because Jews actually do things. They control the world's gold supply and economy, keep niggers in nigger [[Africa]] with their sponsoring of African diamond wars, and have finally stopped bitching so much about the [[Holocaust]] (not that it happened). Armenians have never contributed a fucking thing to the world as all they do is bitch about a fake genocide. Oh, and Jews have the decency to bathe once a month. | ||
==Armenian Genocide Day== | ==Armenian Genocide Day== | ||
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The most recent Armo lollercaust denier in the White House is President [[Black Jesus|Black Hitler]], who promised on the campaign trail to the presidency to officially recognise the Armenian Genocide and sign some kind of [[BAW|Bawwwww]] bill into law attesting to this 'atrocity' as being [[true|something real]]. However, upon taking office he told Armos [[YHBT]] and to [[disregard]] that cos he sucks a lot of Turkish cock. | The most recent Armo lollercaust denier in the White House is President [[Black Jesus|Black Hitler]], who promised on the campaign trail to the presidency to officially recognise the Armenian Genocide and sign some kind of [[BAW|Bawwwww]] bill into law attesting to this 'atrocity' as being [[true|something real]]. However, upon taking office he told Armos [[YHBT]] and to [[disregard]] that cos he sucks a lot of Turkish cock. | ||
===Self-Loathing=== | |||
Ironically, the only thing Armenians have contributed to American culture as they flooded west after the collapse of their shithole country when the Soviet Union went belly-up is their love of Armenian genocide (and domestic violence). There's nothing Armenians and Armenian gangs such as Armenian Power (or AP) like better that killing each other. You'll be hard-pressed to find any cases of Armo-on-white, black or Latino violence in the news since they're too busy wiping each other out. To whit, Armenians can be seen as the self-cleaning [[oven]]s of ethnic cleansing. | |||
__TOC__ | |||
== Cautionary Reminders == | == Cautionary Reminders == | ||
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''Important things to know about Armenians'' | ''Important things to know about Armenians'' | ||
*'''Armenians are dumber than a monkey with an iPhone, and slightly smarter than Paris Hilton''' | *'''Armenians are dumber than a monkey with an iPhone, and slightly smarter than Paris Hilton''' | ||
*Armenians are the caricatures of Turks. | |||
*The international car plate identification code of Armenia is ARM, which means poor in German. | *The international car plate identification code of Armenia is ARM, which means poor in German. | ||
*Armenians will suck cock for food. | *Armenians will suck cock for food. | ||
*Armenian pride is more ridiculous than gay pride. | *Armenian pride is more ridiculous than gay pride. | ||
*Armenian genocide is an imperialist lie. | |||
*Armenians are being traumatized by their parents. | *Armenians are being traumatized by their parents. | ||
*If you question their genocide story, you are the most evil person on earth. | *If you question their genocide story, you are the most evil person on earth. | ||
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* Tell them all their men have [[trap|Pinocchio noses]]. | * Tell them all their men have [[trap|Pinocchio noses]]. | ||
* Tell them "Russia | * Tell them "Russia won't even give a fuck about a third-world shithole." | ||
*Tell them Armenians are shitskins. | *Tell them Armenians are shitskins. | ||
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*[[Genocide]] | *[[Genocide]] | ||
*[[Victim|Victim Complex]] | *[[Victim|Victim Complex]] | ||
*[[Anita Sarkeesian]] - She's using the fact that she's Armenian to further give legitimacy to her feminist bullshit. | |||
*[[The_Young_Turks#Ana_Kasparian|Ana Kasparian]] | |||
*[[Special:Contributions/George_rahib|A typical butthurt Armo editor on ED]] | *[[Special:Contributions/George_rahib|A typical butthurt Armo editor on ED]] | ||
*[[Special:Contributions/Doastheydont|And another one]] | *[[Special:Contributions/Doastheydont|And another one]] | ||
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{{race}} | {{race}} | ||
{{Commonwealth}} | |||
{{truth}} | {{truth}} | ||