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[[image:sillyturks.jpg|thumb|right|Armenians in their natural habitat.]] | [[image:sillyturks.jpg|thumb|right|Armenians in their natural habitat.]] | ||
[[File:Serzh Sargsyan.jpg|thumb|200px|[[Serzh Sargsyan]]: Karabakhian man is president of Armenia.]] | [[File:Serzh Sargsyan.jpg|thumb|200px|<s>[[Serzh Sargsyan]]: Karabakhian man is president of Armenia</s> Some [[Osama bin Laden]] lookalike is their leader now, after a [[revolution]] in 2018.]] | ||
[[File:Armo_pride_flag.jpg|thumb|200px|Armo [[Gay|pride]] flag. Hmmm. Suspicious]] | [[File:Armo_pride_flag.jpg|thumb|200px|Armo [[Gay|pride]] flag. Hmmm. Suspicious]] | ||
Although '''[[Armenia]]ns''' (from the Greek ''armenios'', meaning "hairy and yak like") are technically [[Asian]], you'd have better luck finding a [[nigger]] at a [[KKK|Klan]] [[:File:Lynching.jpg|rally]] than an Armo in [[Armenia]] after [[at least 100]] years of [[pwn]]age by their [[turkey|Turkish]] [[Nazis|neighbors]]. Armenians are mixture of Middle Eastern DNA and [[over 9,000]] years of incest. In Armenia not only can you marry your first cousin, you can marry your half-sister. They are easily mistaken for Mexicans with huge noses and usually dress like blind transvestite hookers (women) or decked out in G-Unit sweaters and gold chains | Although '''[[Armenia]]ns''' (from the Greek ''armenios'', meaning "hairy and yak like") are technically [[Asian]], you'd have better luck finding a [[nigger]] at a [[KKK|Klan]] [[:File:Lynching.jpg|rally]] than an Armo in [[Armenia]] after [[at least 100]] years of [[pwn]]age by their [[turkey|Turkish]] [[Nazis|neighbors]]. Armenians are mixture of Middle Eastern DNA and [[over 9,000]] years of incest. In Armenia not only can you marry your first cousin, you can marry your half-sister. They are easily mistaken for Mexicans with huge noses and usually dress like blind transvestite hookers (women) or decked out in G-Unit sweaters and gold chains (men). | ||
[[christian|Smarter]] than your average Jew, the Armenians knew a [[genocide|lose/lose situation]] when they saw it, so they moved in with their auntie and uncle in [[The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air|Bel-Air]]. Because they couldn't find a way to [[steal|lease]] their four BMWs as well as an apartment in Bel-Air they all immediately moved to Glendale. The cloud of cheap cigarette smoke and Kabob fumes linger over most of Brand Blvd. to this day. | [[christian|Smarter]] than your average Jew, the Armenians knew a [[genocide|lose/lose situation]] when they saw it, so they moved in with their auntie and uncle in [[The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air|Bel-Air]]. Because they couldn't find a way to [[steal|lease]] their four BMWs as well as an apartment in Bel-Air they all immediately moved to Glendale. The cloud of cheap cigarette smoke and Kabob fumes linger over most of Brand Blvd. to this day. | ||
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Before long, Glendale was overrun with [[gun]] totin', G-Unit wearin', bling-bling sportin' Armo-[[Wiggers]] driving Cadillac Escalades bumpin' shitty [[raver|disco]] music with no bass through massive speakers around the sleepy hollow. The village elders acted swiftly and [[do not want|banished]] the nascent Armo [[gangsta]] menace to East Hollywood (aka the United Subculture Internment Camp), a place where black person of every race, creed and color go to [[fail|chase]] the [[crap|American Dream]] and every nationality gets it's own four blocks to call its own. Unfortunately, the only thing Armenian women are good for (''besides standing in front of you in the grocery line talking loudly on her cellphone'') is pumping out half-retarded wannabe gangster children and Glendale was soon overcome by the menace once again. | Before long, Glendale was overrun with [[gun]] totin', G-Unit wearin', bling-bling sportin' Armo-[[Wiggers]] driving Cadillac Escalades bumpin' shitty [[raver|disco]] music with no bass through massive speakers around the sleepy hollow. The village elders acted swiftly and [[do not want|banished]] the nascent Armo [[gangsta]] menace to East Hollywood (aka the United Subculture Internment Camp), a place where black person of every race, creed and color go to [[fail|chase]] the [[crap|American Dream]] and every nationality gets it's own four blocks to call its own. Unfortunately, the only thing Armenian women are good for (''besides standing in front of you in the grocery line talking loudly on her cellphone'') is pumping out half-retarded wannabe gangster children and Glendale was soon overcome by the menace once again. | ||
According to certain [[nobody|experts]], Armenians are, in fact, worse than Jews. This is because Jews actually do things. They control the world's gold supply and economy, keep niggers in nigger [[Africa]] with their sponsoring of African diamond wars, and have finally stopped bitching so much about the [[Holocaust]] (not that it happened). Armenians have never contributed a fucking thing to the world they | According to certain [[nobody|experts]], Armenians are, in fact, worse than Jews. This is because Jews actually do things. They control the world's gold supply and economy, keep niggers in nigger [[Africa]] with their sponsoring of African diamond wars, and have finally stopped bitching so much about the [[Holocaust]] (not that it happened). Armenians have never contributed a fucking thing to the world as all they do is bitch about a fake genocide. Oh, and Jews have the decency to bathe once a month. | ||
==Armenian Genocide Day== | ==Armenian Genocide Day== | ||
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Armenians send lots of money to their [[Armenia|country]] to help it <s>kill</s> serve [[Turkey#Azerbaijan|the <s>subhuman Turks</s> master Turks]]. Armenians never seem to get [[Troll's remorse]] and thus self-hating Armenians are almost unheard of. | Armenians send lots of money to their [[Armenia|country]] to help it <s>kill</s> serve [[Turkey#Azerbaijan|the <s>subhuman Turks</s> master Turks]]. Armenians never seem to get [[Troll's remorse]] and thus self-hating Armenians are almost unheard of. | ||
==Map of Armenia== | |||
<center>{{bigpic|Armos.jpg|900|300|Official map of Armenian Lulz Parade}}</center> | |||
==Armenian Courtship and Mating - A Hairy Hoing Experience== | |||
[[Image:Armenian Whore Camera Phone Pic.jpg|thumb|right|A visual aid provided by Abram Magodev of his [[Armenians#Armenian_Courtship_and_Mating_--_A_Hairy_Hoing_Experience|Armenian whore-r story]].]] | |||
[[Image:ArmenianGay.jpg|thumb|Most Armenian males will never admit how secretly gay they are.]] | |||
'''''As Told By Abram Magomedov''''' | |||
To the modern world today, Armenians are what Jews used to be for medieval Europe. Everyone's heard about them, but no one's actually seen them. Their hooked eagle noses, their gut wrenching BO, and their hairy [[cumdumpsters|women]] are the stuff of legend. | |||
As if hairy arms, thick black mustaches, shapeless asses and inner-tube tummies weren't torture enough, Armenian girls won't screw you unless you put a ring on their finger. That's because if an Armenian chick isn't pure, she'll never get married and will never become the Middle Eastern [[breeder]] she's aspired for so long to become. | |||
Anyway, after more than an hour cruising Yerevan's tochkas, we finally found a banya stocked with two of its own in-house [[whores]]. After seeing the first whore - her face was pretty, but her body consisted of hairy arms, rolls of stomach fat, two stumpy legs and a big, shapeless ass - I told my friend that she was all his and I'd go with the next one. | |||
That was a bad gamble. | |||
The second whore - the whore I was now stuck with - could've easily passed for an overfed crack ho. Her matted, oily peroxided hair, pockmarked face masked by flaking white face powder, lard body and matching pink mini skirt outfit made her looked like a cross between the Bride of Frankenstein and Miss Piggy. | |||
There was no chance of leaving for the next two hours - Armen was my ride. For a long while, I just sat in silence, watching Armenian TV and downing shots of vodka, before deciding that I just had to get it over with. I didn't want to, but I didn't really have a choice. | |||
She took a shower, immediately put her pink bra back on and promptly lay down on the bed with her legs wide spread, exposing a dark hairy patch of hair that stretched from her lower stomach all the way into her ass. I took a shower too and she motioned for me join her. As I moved closer, the patches of curly black hair on her big toes hinted at why she put her bra back on. | |||
Even though I realized what lay beneath, I appreciated that gesture. Staring at a pair of hairy nipples would have been far nastier than simply knowing that they were there. It would have made the whole thing impossible to complete. | |||
I got on the bed and positioned myself on my knees between her legs but I couldn't bring myself to lie on top of her. Her skin was a patchwork of red splotches and zits, a few of which on her shoulder had been scratched off and glistened with fresh blood and pus. Every inch of her body screamed biohazard. I was paralyzed with revulsion. Sensing that I needed help, she pushed me down on the bed, got between my legs and started to jerk me off. I thought it would be hopeless. No way was my dick volunteering for such horror. But no, a few unloving tugs and my dick starting coming to life. That was puzzling. | |||
She got it into a semi-soft nub, slipped on a jimmy, rolled over onto her back and spread her legs again. | |||
Resting on my knees and supporting myself with my hands so that I wouldn't press against her body, I managed to get on top of her and position my dick as close as a I could to her snatch. She grabbed my dick and slipped it in. I couldn't feel a thing. She attempted to pull me down towards her, but I resisted. | |||
I closed my eyes, found a rim of her snatch that I could rub against and concentrated on fucking it. But I had no room and with every thrust I could feel her day-old leg stubble chafing my skin like sandpaper. There was no way I could maintain the little cock pressure that I had. I had to abort mission. | |||
As I got up, to my horror, she actually enjoyed it. A lot. She smiled - and in her half-guttural Russian - promised me a freebie on my birthday. I drank vodka continuously in an effort to black myself out. It was a good thing Armen was driving. I wasn't sure how he managed to drag me back into the car. | |||
From that day on, the very mention of [[Armenia]] would numb me like a vodka hangover. | |||
== Fun Facts about Armenians == | == Fun Facts about Armenians == | ||
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I have met many of them and have yet to say there is at least one of them with some kind of integrity. What a shame!! (Rachel Maddow) | I have met many of them and have yet to say there is at least one of them with some kind of integrity. What a shame!! (Rachel Maddow) | ||
Unibrow? Armenian. Waste a bullet. (Abraham Lincoln advice to Turkey) | Unibrow? Armenian. Waste a bullet. (Abraham Lincoln advice to Turkey) | ||
==Trolling the Armenians== | |||
*Remind them that the [[Turkey|Turks]] will eventually take over. | |||
*Confuse them with Gypsies. | |||
*Ask one that "If you're so rich in culture, why did Armenia lose their old traditions about 500 years ago to the Turks?" | |||
*Ask them to join Islam. | |||
*Say anything good about Azerbaijan, anything at all. | |||
*Post a picture of armenian genocide with the caption "pwnd". | |||
*Tell them Karabakh never belonged to them, it was always part of Azerbaijan. | |||
* Tell them all their men have [[trap|Pinocchio noses]]. | |||
* Tell them "Russia won't even give a fuck about a third-world shithole." | |||
*Tell them Armenians are shitskins. | |||
==Gallery== | ==Gallery== | ||
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==See Also== | ==See Also== | ||
*[[Kurd]]s | *[[Kurd]]s | ||
*[[Jews]] | *[[Jews]] | ||
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*[[Genocide]] | *[[Genocide]] | ||
*[[Victim|Victim Complex]] | *[[Victim|Victim Complex]] | ||
*[[Anita Sarkeesian]] - She's using the fact that she's Armenian to further give legitimacy to her feminist bullshit. | |||
*[[The_Young_Turks#Ana_Kasparian|Ana Kasparian]] | |||
*[[Special:Contributions/George_rahib|A typical butthurt Armo editor on ED]] | *[[Special:Contributions/George_rahib|A typical butthurt Armo editor on ED]] | ||
*[[Special:Contributions/Doastheydont|And another one]] | *[[Special:Contributions/Doastheydont|And another one]] | ||
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{{race}} | {{race}} | ||
{{Commonwealth}} | |||
{{truth}} | {{truth}} | ||