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BioShock Infinite: Difference between revisions
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*'''Elizabeth''': The girl Booker's hired to get. The developers [[Trying too hard|try way too hard]] to make the player care about her as they make her a [[Doctor_Who|time lord]], Booker's daughter, and Columbia's heir; but in the end, she's just walking [[tits|cleavage]] designed to get virgin gamers to buy the game. This was a huge success despite her actually looking like a bridge dwelling troll from folk novels, but no one looks at her face. | *'''Elizabeth''': The girl Booker's hired to get. The developers [[Trying too hard|try way too hard]] to make the player care about her as they make her a [[Doctor_Who|time lord]], Booker's daughter, and Columbia's heir; but in the end, she's just walking [[tits|cleavage]] designed to get virgin gamers to buy the game. This was a huge success despite her actually looking like a bridge dwelling troll from folk novels, but no one looks at her face. | ||
*'''Zachary Hale Comstock''': An old guy that built Columbia to escape the [[nigger]] and [[spic]] hordes below. [[Nice try|Respectable effort in itself,]]Respectable effort in itself, but since time-travel gave him [[erectile dysfunction]], he decided to kill his wife and buy Elizabeth from Booker. One of the fifty million plot twists of this game is that Comstock is Booker. | *'''Zachary Hale Comstock''': An old guy that built Columbia to escape the [[nigger]] and [[spic]] hordes [[America|below]]. [[Nice try|Respectable effort in itself,]]Respectable effort in itself, but since time-travel gave him [[erectile dysfunction]], he decided to kill his wife and buy Elizabeth from Booker. One of the fifty million plot twists of this game is that Comstock is Booker. | ||
*'''Robert and Rosalind Lutece''': Without a doubt, the least memorable characters in the game despite them never shutting the fuck up. Two [[Autist]]ic autophiliacs who are supposedly just alternate versions of each other. They took masturbation one step further and found out what it would be like to plow yourself. Contributing not only to alternate reality [[bullshit|science]], but to the science of guzzling your own alternative version's cum. | *'''Robert and Rosalind Lutece''': Without a doubt, the least memorable characters in the game despite them never shutting the fuck up. Two [[Autist]]ic autophiliacs who are supposedly just alternate versions of each other. They took masturbation one step further and found out what it would be like to plow yourself. Contributing not only to alternate reality [[bullshit|science]], but to the science of guzzling your own alternative version's cum. | ||