BioShock Infinite: Difference between revisions
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imported>Cobaltcat No edit summary |
imported>WeeabooHunter (→Burial At Sea Episode One: episode one and two) |
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The game uses cartoony graphics, and shitloads of bloom and HDR, to mask that it actually looks like shit. [http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130406210051/bioshock/images/e/e5/Elizabethsmili.png With those shitty graphics] it actually looks like [http://wiimedia.ign.com/wii/image/article/104/1040021/tales-of-monkey-island-chapter-4-the-trial-and-execution-of-guybrush-threepwood-20091028000657933_640w.jpg Tales of Monkey Island]. Elizabeth also has a [http://images.eurogamer.net/2012/articles/1/5/3/6/6/5/7/135575229036.png head the size of her upper body], while looking like an [http://static.giantbomb.com/uploads/original/12/122165/1833673-elizabeth_bioshock.jpg 8 year old girl]. She is supposed to look [[pedophile | 17.]] And to appeal to the ronery anime [[NEET]] crowd, [http://images2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130301211904/bioshock/images/3/31/BioShockInfiniteLizThumbAIIGNVid.jpg her eyes] are [http://images2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130402012743/bioshock/images/4/4f/8870_2013-04-01_00001.jpg twice bigger] than any other character's. | The game uses cartoony graphics, and shitloads of bloom and HDR, to mask that it actually looks like shit. [http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130406210051/bioshock/images/e/e5/Elizabethsmili.png With those shitty graphics] it actually looks like [http://wiimedia.ign.com/wii/image/article/104/1040021/tales-of-monkey-island-chapter-4-the-trial-and-execution-of-guybrush-threepwood-20091028000657933_640w.jpg Tales of Monkey Island]. Elizabeth also has a [http://images.eurogamer.net/2012/articles/1/5/3/6/6/5/7/135575229036.png head the size of her upper body], while looking like an [http://static.giantbomb.com/uploads/original/12/122165/1833673-elizabeth_bioshock.jpg 8 year old girl]. She is supposed to look [[pedophile | 17.]] And to appeal to the ronery anime [[NEET]] crowd, [http://images2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130301211904/bioshock/images/3/31/BioShockInfiniteLizThumbAIIGNVid.jpg her eyes] are [http://images2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130402012743/bioshock/images/4/4f/8870_2013-04-01_00001.jpg twice bigger] than any other character's. | ||
==Burial At Sea | ==Burial At Sea == | ||
[[File:Bioshock Infinite DLC Blatant Design Ripoff.jpg|thumb|right|[[Gay|Irrational Games]] in charge of being creative.]] | [[File:Bioshock Infinite DLC Blatant Design Ripoff.jpg|thumb|right|[[Gay|Irrational Games]] in charge of being creative.]] | ||
This is the title of the next major DLC and unfortunately not what happens to this shit franchise. It will feature one new plasmid and some new weapons. And the first hour will be spend without any actual gameplay. Yes, you will play the exciting game of [[Gone Home|walking around and looking at shit]]. In a game that only actually lasts one and a half hour. <br /> | This is the title of the next major DLC and unfortunately not what happens to this shit franchise. It will feature one new plasmid and some new weapons. And the first hour will be spend without any actual gameplay. Yes, you will play the exciting game of [[Gone Home|walking around and looking at shit]]. In a game that only actually lasts one and a half hour. <br /> | ||
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'''OH SO EDGY'''<br /></center> | '''OH SO EDGY'''<br /></center> | ||
Irrational is also working on a second DLC where you get to play as Elizabeth. Your main objective will be to spawn shit and fellate Booker. <br /> | Irrational is also working on a second DLC where you get to play as Elizabeth. Your main objective will be to spawn shit and fellate Booker. <br /> | ||
===Episode 1=== | |||
Thanks to the multiverse bullshit introduced in infinite, we are now in an alternate reality where we gets to play as the 2 poorly developed character from infinte and raping the fluff to oblivion. Booker and Elizabeth went to find their lost pedobait, but leads them to the insane faggot from first game and they got electrocuted, and died (I wish). After that, they gets to fight many down syndrome version of the splicer from [[bioshock|first game]] with even less <s>plasmid</s> vigor to chose from. In the end, Booker find out he is Cumstuck, Elizabeth had him [[Gurren Lagann|drill raped]] by a big daddy. | |||
===Episode 2=== | |||
This time you gets to play as Elizabeth. After all the shit she went through, she is suddenly powerless and becomes Atlas bitch for the entire game. After went through countless hours train wreck of a stealth section that made metal gear looks playable. Elizabeth translated a single piece of paper and was knocked the fuck out by Atlas. Since Irrational is died by this point, Ken just shove a connection between Bioshock 1 and Infinite for no reason. | |||
== Reception == | == Reception == | ||