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[[image:cheapporn.jpg|200px|right]]
Bacteria: Bacteria! We begin with only one!
'''Pornography''' (known as '''Porn''' to lazy asses and '''Pr0n''' to [[1337|fuckfaces]]) is <s>the best thing since sliced bread</s> the reason you're not allowed your cell phone in school anymore, it's the reason all your relationships are fucked, it's the reason your homework is never done on time, it's the reason your parents put filters on your computer, it's the reason your boss installed security cameras in the dry storage room and it's the reason you will [[die alone]]. Ninety-nine percent of all bandwidth on the internet is devoted to porn and it's a proven fact that if live-action '''porn''' includes both genders, the director will spend 90% of the shots with a close up of the men's ass and 90% of his paycheck on [[opioids#heroin|smack]].
 
== Controversy ==
 
[[File:Getthefacts.jpg|right|185px]]
 
All [[Feminists]] are against '''pornography''' and think that men who watch it, or even think about it, are rapists. Feminists say "They may feel shame inside, badness, and a sense of pain, which they can’t seem to escape. They assume that they could never be forgiven or loved again.", however, they just say this to lower men to their level of lovelessness. They also state that ''all'' '''pornography''' is [[rape]] and violence against women, even if it's [[Win|male-to-male]] '''porn'''. But the cunts are not alone in this. [[Teens Against Porn|Christians]] are also against '''porn''' due to the typical Christian's infantile phobia of anything that might become more popular than God.
 
{{Squote|The conflict between men and women is brutal. "The normal fuck," writes [[Andrea Dworkin]], "by a normal man is taken to be an act of invasion and ownership undertaken in a mode of predation." This special insight into the sexual psychology of males is matched and confirmed by the sexual experience of women:
<br>
"Women have been chattels to men as wives, as prostitutes, as sexual and reproductive servants. Being owned and being fucked are or have been virtually synonymous experiences in the lives of women. He owns you; he fucks you. The fucking conveys the quality of ownership: he owns you inside out."
<br><br>
Dworkin and her colleague, Catharine MacKinnon, then call for the censorship of pornography on postmodern grounds. Our social reality is constructed by the language we use, and pornography is a form of language, one that constructs a violent and domineering reality for women to submit to. Pornography, therefore, is not free speech but political oppression."
|[http://www.libertarianismo.org/livros/srchpostmodernism.pdf ''Explaining Postmodernism'']}}
 
==Types==
[[image:Prondad.gif|250px|right]]
{{main|Fetish}}
*[[Acrotomophilia]]: All the amputees you could ever [[fap]] to
*[[Alt-Porn]]: Chicks with tattoos posing
*[[Accidental Nudity]]: Fake up-skirts, popular with [[pedos]]
*[[Straight]]: Boring to people but enjoyed by [[Cats]]
*[[List of Porn Parodies|Parodies]]: Because the regular versions weren't unfunny enough
*[[Gay]]: Fave of [[Republicans]]
*[[Lesbian]]: What feminists get a hard-on for every night
*[[Animal]] porn and [[Bestiality]]: Enjoyed by [[Furries]] who want to be fucked by animals themselves.
*[[Gimps Gone Wild]]
*[[Cakepony]]
*[[Hentai]]: What wapanese [[MAH BOI|strive for]]
**[[Baby Fuck]]: Babies
**[[Dickgirl]]: Hermaphrodites
**[[Guro]]: Japan's all-time favorite
**[[Lolicon]]: Underage girls
**[[Shibari]]: Rope
**[[Shotacon]]: Underage boys
**[[Toddlercon]]: Toddlers
*[[Furry Porn]]: extremely perverse imagery of cartoon animals in unrealistic sexual situations
*[[Rape|Surprise sex]]
*[[Arborphilia]]: Liberal favorite
*[[Voraphile]]: Swallowing-whole
*[[Gangbang]]: Fun for everybody
*[[Buttsecks]]
*[[Scat]]: Feces
*[[Roman Showers]]
*[[BDSM]]
*[[Partial Unbirthing]]
*[[Furniture Porn]]
*[[Old porn]]
*[[Necrophilia]]
*[[SFW Porn]]
*[[Cyber sex]]
 
==Notable Porn Alumni==
[[File:AshBluKhan.png|thumb|[http://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=533395514&t=359.73 A Khan Tusion money shot].]]
*'''Khan Tusion''' ([[Powerword]]: Mark W. Handel): An [[awesome]] dude [[Anonymous|who never shows his face or lets his real voice be heard]], so as to elude all the anti-porn faggots out there. Enjoys trolling women when he isn't [[Curb Stomp|stomping]] on them with dirty sneakers or strangling them unconscious, sometimes when the camera isn't even rolling. His weird lisp implies that he is a closeted homosexual, explaining his vast and unending hatred for all things with a [[vagina]]. [http://motherless.com/DD20649 The maestro's finest hour].
 
<center>{{morphquote|RPQuotes|background-color: #FFFFFF;|font-weight: bold;
|Be careful. Because you can get me so angry, I'm going to blow right by your fucking [[safeword]], and I'm going to tear your head off. You hear me?|The Man, The Myth, The Legend
|Meatholes was a bad time in my life. If you liked that I am sorry but don't ever plan on seeing me mentally abused ever again or for that matter abused in any way like that. I would never do it again. I do not like being MENTALY ABUSED! No one should ever have to be mentally abused like that. I do porn because I love sex and I love to have fun but Meatholes was not fun. It is just sick and I am sorry to say that is something that I am not proud of. Because I am generally proud of all my work.|[http://www.redtube.com/241648 Taryn Thomas]
|I actually had lunch with him one time, and he tried to choke me in public.|[[Alt-Porn#Dana DeArmond|Dana DeArmond]]
|I had a situation where I met Khan Tusion, the guy from Meat Holes. I was twenty. And he tried to strangle me. This was not even on camera. This was like him strangling me in a bathroom somewhere. And it was terrible. And I thought, 'Oh my god, I'm gonna be murdered, this sucks. Everyone was right. Porn's so evil.' But he's like the most evil person to ever come into porn. He is like that nightmare that every mother and father who's child is in porn is like, 'That’s who they're working with every day. It's Khan Tusion.'|Kimberly Kane
|So what they did was leave the crying and the kicking and the screaming in when I was saying, 'Stop the cameras' because this man was hurting me. He tossed me over his shoulder and was using hard fists and slapped me on the ass and grabbed me by the throat and grabbed me by the neck and I was choking and I wanted them to turn off the cameras because I thought that wasn't really what I wanted to get involved in. I was scared for my life, to be honest with you. And they literally brought so much terror to my forefront, and I was so horrified, and so shocked that their glory was showing on camera that I had no idea that I was going be beaten up. They basically caught that raw emotion and they also caught me sobbing and saying, 'Can you stop it? Like for real, for real, for real.' <br> <br> I saw the one cameraman put down his camera and walk away, like, 'OK guys, she's not joking around,' and then I saw the back one kicking in and shooting as I'm running off the set in tears going, 'You fucking assholes.'... I felt like I was getting totally violated, how somebody being raped would feel when they're saying, 'Stop it,'  and then the guy doesn't stop and then she feels that she deserved it. I was crying and it's just... it's really sad.|Regan Starr
|Choked Out describes how Khan Tusion told her [Ashley Blue] he loved to choke women out in his videos and asks her to let him do it. Her then-boyfriend also gets in on the choking out action. At one point, she looks up in his eyes and sees sheer hatred a desire by Khan to stomp her into the pavement forever and ever. This man's hatred for women is simply visceral. We watch the video as her face gets red and then purple. Finally, she passes out. Small claims she almost died on the set that day.|Robert Lindsay
|It's exciting as Hell. It's better than taking drugs.|Khan reveals his motivation in ''Hardcore''}}</center>
*'''[[Max Hardcore]]''' (Powerword: Paul F. Little): Another champ, he always has sex with a cowboy hat on, and helped to popularize many acts of [[sick fuck]]ery that we now take for granted, such as golden showers, [[Jam It In|throat fucking a bitch so hard that she vomits all over the place]], and [[Goatse|goatsing]] orifices to unheard of levels. [[V&]] after making a bunch of videos of himself fucking boobless skanks (dressed up and made to act like twelve-year olds) in front of older whores pretending to be the distraught mothers of the [[loli]]s.
*'''Rob Black''' (Powerword: Rob Zicari): A sleazy and probably [[Wop|Italian]] fellow whose company specialized in pornos full of [[Guro|blood]], beatings, [[rape]], [[torture]], pretension, and scenes in which women are made to do things like [[Scat|eat their own enemal expulsions]] out of doggie bowls. Ran for mayor of [[LA]] for the lulz, and was v& after he [[Fuck The Police|dared the government]] to try and shut him down.
*'''Lizzie Borden''' (Powerword: Janet Romano): Rob's fat but still doable wife, she named herself after a psycho who hacked her own parents to bits with an axe. Being abused by her mother (surprise, surprise) apparently warped Lizzie to the point that she now gets off on creating pornos in which men savagely brutalize girls playing roles like "Underage Virgin" and "Expectant Mother".
*'''[[Internet tough guy|Duke Skywalker]]''' (Powerword: Donald Emil Vollenweider/Donato Cassano): Khan Tusion 2 - [[Electric Boogaloo]]; a [[New Jersey|Joisey]] [[redneck]] and the proprietor of websites such as Facial Abuse, Ghetto Gaggers, and Black on Black Crime, he has been called the [[Simon Cowell]] and [[Gordon Ramsay]] of porn due to possessing a razor sharp wit when it comes to mocking and belittling sluts, which is admittedly not that difficult. His stable of studs (which once included the "funny" and "female friendly" [[Alt-Porn#Tommy Pistol|Tommy Pistol]]) is mostly made up of hairy middle-aged [[fat]]soes and/or probable ex-cons who couldn't make it in Hollywood porn, so they take their [[RAEG]] over this out on any bimbos who are dumb and/or [[Drug|desperate]] enough to agree to appear in one of [[Shit|The Duke's]] franchises. Call him a misogynist, and he'll claim to have a girlfriend who it seems like no one has ever met or seen.
*'''[[John Holmes]]''' (Powerword: John Curtis Holmes): The King of Porn, at least until he was reduced to an abusive, alcoholic, drug-addicted, disease-ridden wreck whose mile-long rap sheet included suspicion of involvement in a gang-related mass murder case. His huge schlong made up for him being a complete and utter failure in everything he attempted that did not involve sex.
*'''[[Nigger|Steve Driver]]''' (Powerword: Stephen Clancy Hill): A loser even among other no-name male porn stars, Stephen at least went out in style, [[An hero|jumping off a cliff]] after attacking three people with [[Wapanese|a ''fucking'' samurai sword]] when they tried to evict him from the studio office he was squatting in. As the only fatality was a fellow nobody (and a [[Chink]], to boot) [[And nothing of value was lost|not much of a shit was given]].
*'''Lara Roxx:''' A [[Moralfag]] cautionary tale come to life, Lara was a [[Canuck]] [[butterface]] who got [[HIV]] on the set of [[Lulz|''the very first porno she appeared in'', at age 21]].
*'''OG Mudbone:''' A nigger with the biggest [[Niggerdick|niggerdick]] in porn. Famous for his hilarious grunts and moans and being able to shower his hoes with [[Over 9000|GALLONS]] of [[cum]]. Literally showers bitches in cum so that they can't fucking see shit.
 
== Gallery ==
 
{{cg||P|center|<gallery perrow="5">
File:Armpit-sex.jpg|This is not [[rule 34|rule 34]], because it is normal Turkish porn.
File:Rule 34.jpg|'''[[Rule 34]]''' is all that you need to know about the internet in regards to porn
File:Buttcam.jpg|There's no limit to the amount of [[sick fuck]] fetishes out there...
File:Nailboobs.jpg|[[I seriously hope you guys don't do this|*fap fap fap*]]
File:Woman on all fours.jpg|She's about to begin experiencing every single fetish, ever conceived, over the course of about 6 months.
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
File:Peanut porn.jpg
File:Crazyhump.gif
File:Girl fountain.gif
File:Lycra.gif
File:lmaowutt.jpg|For the man on the go!
File:Jet-Puffed Marshmallow Creme.jpg
File:Candy Corn porn.PNG|The candy adds an extra dimension of erotisism to this image because it's all been inside her pussy!
File:lezzpron.jpg|The more painful, the more arousing
File:french_kiss_science.jpg|Medical porn, the doctor just killed the patient and still wanted to mess him up
File:Japwesternpron.jpg
File:Japanese porn.jpg
File:Japanese Porn.jpeg
File:Simpsons Porn.jpg|[[Pain series|Typical Simpson's Porn]]
File:Porn Admission.jpg
File:w90220170.jpg|Even rabbits have their porn magazines
File:alien_porn.jpg
File:Wierdporn.jpg
File:pornodog.jpg|A Typical Porno Aficionado
File:Flypron.jpg
File:Porn reaction dick.jpg|[[you]]r reaction to gay furry porn
File:Teensloveoldmen.jpg
File:Dorian-thorn-mothers-day.jpg|[[Dorian Thorn|Some people]] make themselves porn stars by accident
File:ScreechedThePorno.jpg|On sale for $34.95 at your neighborhood porno shop
File:Pom1.JPG
File:Pigandpooper.jpg
File:Porn Art.jpg
File:Butterfly Snake.jpg|Butterfly snakes are symbolic of hermaphrodites.
File:Michelangeloporn.jpg|[[Christians]] consider art porn...
File:Stop bird porn.jpg|As well as they consider bird-watching voyeurism
File:Pornography Historian.jpg
File:Porn and Disney.jpg
File:Must save porn.jpg
File:Pr0n_-_Video_Porn_Chat_Pwned.jpg|Pwned on video porn chat!
File:Pr0n_-_Nerd_Confidence.jpg
File:Sandy squirrel 34.jpg|[[Shock|They see that these things should hide to the children?!]]
File:Hookersandblow.jpg
File:Titillating nec pic.jpg|Necrophile porn or just some gross bitch fucking around?
File:Jesus porn mosaic.jpg|[[Jesus]] made of porn
File:Blackbabe.jpg
File:Blackbabe2.jpg
File:Sport.jpg
File:!9th century pron.jpg|Vintage
</gallery>}}
 
==See Also==
[[File:BunnyGirl.jpg|100px|thumb|This is not the [[Christian|Easter Bunny]], the Easter Bunny NEVER hides it's pussy!!]]
*[[Rule 34]]
*[[Motherless.com|Motherless]]
*[[YouPorn]]
*[[RedTube]]
*[[ModelMayhem]]
*[[WebCams]]
*[[SensationBot]]
*[[Wikipedia Porn]]
*[[ED Porn Challenge]]
*[[TGP Porn Sites]]
*[[Pornolizer]]
*[[CP|Zika]]
*[[Aries]]
*[[Stickam]]
*[[Dustin Michaels]]
*[[Furniture Porn]]
*[[Gail Dines]]
*[[Dinosaur Erotica]]
*[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Progressive_outer_retinal_necrosis '''Porn''' causes blindness in people with AIDS?] Sure, why not?
 
== External links ==
 
=== Useful search engines ===
 
* [https://www.yandex.com/ Yandex] - a genial porn search engine
* [http://www.fuq.com/ Fuq] - a huge selection of porn videos
 
=== Free Porn sites ===
 
* [http://www.imagefap.com/ Imagefap] &bull; [http://www.tubegalore.com/ Tube Galore] &bull; [http://www.natporn.com/ NatPorn Tube] &bull; [http://www.xvideos.com/ Xvideos Tube] &bull; [http://www.redtube.com/ RedTube] &bull; [http://porntubefilms.nl Porn tube films] &bull; [http://www.4tube.com/ 4tube] &bull; [http://www.judgeporn.com/ JudgePorn] &bull; [http://www.fap-roulette.com Fap Roulette] &bull; [http://www.redtube.com/ RedTube] &bull; [http://www.zootube365.com/ ZooTube] &bull; [http://jible.com/ Jible Porn] &bull; [http://www.youporn.com/ YouPorn] &bull; [http://www.pornhub.com/ Pornhub] &bull; [http://www.youjizz.com/ Youjizz] &bull; [http://www.xnxx.com/ Xnxx] &bull; [http://www.freefuckvidz.com/ Free fuck vidz] &bull; [http://www.sexaprize.com/ Sex-a-prize] &bull; [http://xxxvideos.com/ XXXvideos] &bull; [http://orgasm.com/ Orgasm.com] &bull; [http://spankwire.com/ Spankwire] &bull; [http://pornerd.com/ Pornerd] &bull; [http://keezmovies.com/ KeezMovies] &bull; [http://tube8.com/ Tube8] &bull; [http://youfapfap.com/ Youfapfap]
 
=== Pay Porn sites ===
 
Why use one of the thousands of free porn sites when you can pay for it like a good goy?
 
* [http://www.porn.com/ Porn.com] &bull; [http://www.private.com/ Private.com] &bull; [http://www.brazzers.com/ Brazzers] &bull; [http://www.realitykings.com/ RealityKings] &bull; [http://bangbros.com/ BangBros]
 
 
{{sex}}
 
[[Category:Sex]]
[[Category:Internets Phenomena]]

Revision as of 00:45, 28 January 2022

Bacteria: Bacteria! We begin with only one!