Acne
Acne is a hilarious disease experienced by at least 100% of teenagers and a handful of very unlucky adults.
History
It is common knowledge that approximately 98% of LiveJournal users have acne. Internet Disease can sometimes suppress the symptoms of acne with the help of blur and heal brush enzymes.
Every nerd and geek in the world has acne, which is why they can never get girlfriends or boyfriends. Theoretical physicists have proposed that by finding a cure for acne the world would have less emos and goths, as these two groups are populated exclusively by angsty adolescents who want an excuse to wear an inch-thick layer of makeup.
People with acne are often called "pizzafaces" because of their purported resemblance of their faces to pepperoni pizza. Gross.
Typical Zits
Why Acne is Hilarious
- It's painful.
- It's ugly.
- It's on your face.
- It causes death after 7 days
- It has sex on your face without using a condom, creating more acne
Why Else
- Approximately 100% of asian people have acne
- The shit people with acne make up when you ask them: "Hey, what happened right there" and point to a zit on their face
Acne Online
At some point a bunch of ugly retards decided to make their own acne forum. Trolling the forum is very easy.
- Start a thread saying something like "I need help to get rid of a zit i have on my nose, I want to pop it but i do not want to look like one of those disgusting people that are all scarred up from constantly picking at their acne".
- Start a thread saying that soaking your face in hydrogen peroxide for 10 min got rid of your acne scars for 2 weeks. Hydrogen peroxide is just a weak bleach and WILL turn skin significantly lighter for a day or so.
- Post about how much you "lance" (acanese for poke) your acne and soak it in rubbing alcohol. When everyone replies on how much you should not do that just respond on how you are going to try a new lancing method, repeat.
Cat Acne
Just like filthy hoomans, LOL Kitties can likewise suffer from horrible popping pustules spewing out of their gourds. Cat acne is actually usually worse than people acne and normally caused by allergic reactions. Cats actually have scent glands in their cheeks and chin, which is why they're constantly rubbing their faces all over everything, in order to mark their territory and personal belongings. However that in turn means exposing their already greasy wet faces to any number of vexing irritants like scented cat liter, plastic food bowls and of course piss spray from male cats that have rubbed their ass glands all over your property like a sprinkler. That in turn causes inflammation of your cats pores which in turn creates nasty crustules of zit froth, prompting yer kitty to pick at her face like a jackhammer with her dirty, filth ridden back claws, which in turn causes the entire mess to spawn all out of control like a rancid volcano of vomit and blood until it look like this:
Gallery
Videos
Human Cysts/Zits/Abscesses
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Animal Cysts/Zits/Abscesses
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See Also
External Links
- Popthatzit.com - A website consisting of videos of rednecks popping each others' abscesses with dirty needles
- AcneHelper.info - Proper way to pop your pimple
