Portal:Furfaggotry/Featured Article/Archive
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Newest to oldest articles |
February 2022
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| Dogpatch Press | |
| Real Name | Patrick Lake |
| AKA | Patch O'Furr Patch Packrat, Blake Killpatrick |
| Nationality: | Americunts 
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| Birthday | Unknown (approx 30+) |
| Species | Husky |
| Sub-Species | Old media |
| Genus | Furfag |
Nazis here, Nazis there, Nazis every-fucking-where! That's the mind of the batshit insane roody-poo candy-ass behind the AltFurry blockbot, and that's the mind of anyone that uses it. Anyone right of Stalin is literally part of a death cult and the only salvation is to ignore every furfag not following the script. That's right, either you're a stunning and brave trans neet otherkin fighting one of many self-diagnosed mental illnesses, or you're a jack-booted Ben Johnson involved in a far-right conspiracy hell-bent on the destruction of the free liberal world. Why are you mad anon? You'd only be mad if you were a Nazi. Oh you're not mad? Nazi confirmed. Pwnt n00b LMAO UwU>
January 2022
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| Conner Lupindo Hemming or AshiPaws or whatever he decides to call himself next week | |
| Real Name | Zachary Scott White |
| Given Names | Dracofoxy, Malik A. Pawtendo, Ashi Paws, AshiPawpers, Malik Azreal Megedagik, Ashiato H. Watakashi, Conner Lupindo Hemming, ShadowConner, ConnerFirehawk, KaneSmith, Canidane Foxclaw, StrawberryPawz, MacroFurry, Chronic Vil Megedagik, Corgifox |
| Nationality: | Americunts
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| Birthday | Unknown (estimated 29) |
| Species | Wolf |
| Sub-Species | Mimic |
| Genus | Furfag |
—Conner claiming a prim penis on Secondlife turned him into a faggot | ||
March 2019
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| Sonicfox | |
| Real Name | Dominique McLean |
| Given Names | Sonicfox, Sonicfox5000 |
| Nationality: | Americunts
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| Birthday | March 2, 1998 |
| Species | Homo |
| Sub-Species | Black |
| Genus | Furfag |
January 2019
Kero The Wolf (Powerword: Joshua Hoffman), formerly known as Yami The Wolf, is a Furfag Youtube Nobodies who decided fucking his dog would be a great idea. He was generally regarded as a respected member of the Furry community until info leaked from his Twitter account, indicating that he practised zoophilia and necrophilia as well as having a vore fetish. There has even been talk of Kero's alleged involvement in pedophilia. You do the math.
His dog Koda recently died of kidney failure, and Kero had no problem with admitting that he raped his dog on a regular basis. In the now infamous Telegram chat he expressed concern about his friends raping and dismembering his dog THEN killing it. His "friends" assured that they would never do that without his permission.
Kero was the furfag who was interviewed by the "popular" YouTuber Shane Dawson on July 6, 2017. As a result of Shane's fanbase being mostly autistic kids who watch shit like Jake Paul, Kero went from having 10,000 subscribers to 90,000 subscribers after the interview video was published. He later reached 100,000 subscribers in early 2018, but this success backfired because it meant that when his sick fuckery was suddenly exposed, far more people knew who he was than at any previous point in his excuse for a life.
February 2018
BlueCatRiolu (also known as Riolu The Blue Cat or simply Riolu, powerword: Nicholas Salerno) is a cat-obsessed, narcissistic, chode-gargling fuckstain, who loves to shit out an endless slew of third-rate furry art on DeviantART. All of his works are visibly mouse-drawn with one hand in Microsoft Paint, freeing the other hand for more important activities. This art of his has the consistent quality of blocky, aliased shit, always containing inflation, vore, and other disturbing fetishes (like shipping same genders allegedly).
When not posting his scribblings, BlueCatRiolu enjoys his time on DeviantArt by begging for Points or a Core membership, and writing hate journals about people who criticize him, while linking to them in said journals. These call-out journals have predictably created a strong animosity towards BlueCatRiolu, and as such he must be constantly guarded by a team of highly dedicated white knights, who stand ready to defend him from the evils of constructive criticism and his defectors.
The fact that this guy and his atrocious works of art have pulled in over a half-million page views in a span of about five years, while many great artists squalor in comparative obscurity, should tell you a lot about the current state of DeviantArt, and its user base consisting of mostly teenagers.
April 2017
Crinklemon, originally Ryan Palone, now known as Shyanne Garrett, is an over 30, self-identified hermaphroditic alien foxtaur baby inflationist with telekenetic powers, his made up genetically retarded headmate's pronouns are hir, shi and shit (okay I made up that last one), who works at Walmart creeping everybody the fuck out. When he's not occupied pushing carts at this job, he's busy taking photos of himself wearing shit-filled diapers in the store's family restroom, whilst playing pocket pool. Get ready for a proverbial trip on NASA's "Vomit Comet" after an all you can eat buffet of cheap-ass China cat 'n crap cuisine, cause this only goes down the diaper hole from here!
February 2017
Just when you thought dA had enough edgy little kids. Along comes Viscerotonictsf second coming to PrincessElizabeth013. A narcissistic hypocrite on many subjects like tracing, overreacting to anybody's opinion and criticism they have of her, her lack of copyright knowledge, trigger happy when someone draws or mentions her character and her obsessive behavior over her arch enemy of the internet 
Kyrrah the emo wolf, where she continues the drama for her thirst on Kyrrah and any filthy follower who supports her.
January 2017
A fursuit is an anthropomorphic animal costume worn by a furry. High-quality fursuits are really fucking expensive, as in thousands of dollars (plus a few hundred more on altering the suit so that it has an opening in the groin area so that the wearer can yiff while wearing it) but just like a rapper wearing a 5-pound gold chain, it does not give the furry himself any additional value. While not all fans of the Furfag subculture own or wear fursuits, the only reasons any of them don't is because they're on welfare.
July 2014
Fluffy teh wolf, aka qu33n-fluffy, Kira, and Dru (or Drucilla Violet Adams IRL), is a hideous land whale of a furfag who identifies herself as a "gender fluid" bisexual. She cheats and lies to everyone she encounters online and loves using people for free art. She pulls her own horrific art out of her outstretched vagina and plasters it all over the interwebz so everyone can see her awesome anatomy skillz. All she does is bitch and whine about her problems that no one gives a flying fuck about, and she'll threaten suicide every time someone refuses to e-date her. She even draws underaged p0rn as a bonus.
March 2014
SmilehKitteh (Powerword: Kierstin F. Martin) is, at first glance, one of many mediocre artists that infests deviantART, but upon closer inspection has a soft, nougat fetish center. As is the case with anyone who is a furry, she has a sick fetish. In Smiley's case, her fursona is a Russian Blue cat who is always getting spanked. Now spanking, usually a shameful punishment for the person being spanked, is benign as far as fetishes go, if not for the simple fact this masochistic 23-year-old longs to have her ass bared then spanked.
February 2014
At first glance, Lapfox Trax looks like any other shitty indie electronic record label, with a twist. It’s for furries. There's shitty music, repetitive beats, and fursonas on the album covers along with old vidya game references. Dig deeper however, and you find out that not only is it even worse than it looks, but that Lapfox Trax is actually one man, "Ren Queenston", shitting out album after album of pure garbage when he's done shoving ZetaToys up his ass and then writing songs about it.
January 2014
Rangerphile is the term used to describe the sick mess of a person that is best described as the unique combination of a furry and a Christian, or possibly as a web 1.0 version of a brony.
These people -- if they may be called that -- engage in a pathological sexual practice known as Rangerphilia, which is somewhat like pedophila, but rather than being into children, Rangerphilia consists of insatiable perversion directed at the characters from the shitty Disney cartoon series Chip n' Dale Rescue Rangers.
December 19, 2013
Cyrus/Lemonade Coyote is the fursona of Timothy McCormick, a God hating furfag who had thought he a long life ahead of him. However, God had other plans.
Like all furs he was sexually abused as a child. Details are sketchy but it was probably his father, an uncle, the old man from Family Guy or maybe his dog. As a boy his favorite shows always had cartoon animals in them. No exceptions.
November 25, 2013
TheoTheFox (often just called "Theo" for short, and also known as "WildTheory" on DeviantART) is your local neighborhood sick fuck and artist, offering lots of cool stuff to the interbutts such as horribly drawn vore, horrifying furry porn, and dog dicks for the whole family. He's a self-proclaimed "furry celebrity" and is a master of being an absolute-fucking-child, it's amazing how him and Chasethehedgehog aren't best friends. His daily diet consists of alcohol, other furries, otter dicks, otter vaginas, otter anuses, and otters.
May 10, 2013
Anthrocon is a convention in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania which started at least 100 years ago where furry artwork, memorabilia, and other crap is sold to fat guys with glasses. It's also a convention where fursuiters prance around and talk about how Minevra Mink is hot. No women attend these furry conventions, they are all transvestites. These "women" that attend Anthrocon are fugly bulldykes.
May 3, 2003
Bestiality is the practice of having sex with animals. It is sort of like being a furry, only the animals are real, alive, and, chances are, don't want you shoving your penis in the ass of their fine fuzzy fundament. It's also technically rape most of the time because animals cannot consent to sex.
April 15, 2003
Bronies are the self-titled obsessive fanboy watchers of the television show My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, usually adult men who channel their latent homosexuality and/or daddy issues by watching a show which has an audience bracket that consists of little girls. These basement dwelling sacks of neckbeard flesh latched their grubby hands onto everything pony as soon as they heard the whimsical theme-tune drift through their hairy ears. Bronies smothered themselves with all things related to the show, and spread their sick fetishism throughout the internet, declaring themselves the new collective of asperger ridden no-lifes on the block.