This page contains spoilers — important plot secrets and/or conclusions may be revealed. For example, HOLY SHIT WE HAVE A DA GROUP! SUBMIT YOUR SHITTY ED-RELATED ART OVER HERE!!!!1
Deviantart's new logo, proudly plagiarized from platzkart.ru; avoid at all costs if your sanity is important to you!
Every horror of the Internet, disguised as art
DeviantART front page: At any given moment you will come across an asian, a camwhore, some furry art, or something "abstract".If you want to learn anything about art, stay the hell away from this place
At first glance, DeviantArt (also known as DeviantShart, and Tartletistan) appears to be an inspiring treasure-trove of wishful-thinkingfanart and pseudo-professional "artwork".
In reality, it is one of the most fucked-up internet communities the Web 2.0 has to offer. The words "societal degeneration" are an understatement to what lurks on this website.
Users constantly check and update their profile page's E-penis here and violently force it to grow larger, so all the other sick fucks in the world can share the common love of uncontrolled circlejerking and having a pseudo-safe haven for their weird fetishes.
While similar establishments like MTV destroyed good music by motivating the public to become wiggers and prostatots, deviantART destroys the "good" art world by fulfilling its function of turning out furry drama whores and emoattention whores. Constant exposure to this site, no matter who you are, will make you end up in an asylum. But of course you're a sick bastard, and you will go back there and create 200 sock accounts, and log in thru multiple browser windows in order to fap to the (tamer than FurAffinity) draenei pinups and harpy pinups and Derpy shemale splooge cartoons. The internet knows what you want, you sick over-30 scab eater. dA has you covered for everything (other than dicks, sorry homos) and can feed almost any sick fetish. It's funny that a cartooning site with tens of thousands of cartoonists, from 11-year-old shitheads to hardened professionals, can only boast Curt Sibling as its "funniest artist". That is the ultimate fucked-uppiness of dA. The artitsts on it are SRS BSNS and very few of them are even trying to be funny. It feeds their broken little egos and that is the most important function of dA.
If the art community as a whole had cancer, then deviantART would be the biggest malignant tumor of them all.
Prepare to see this on every deviation on the site.
This is what comes up in a search for "fine art" on deviantART.Is this your popularity guide?
Artisan Crafts - Before the invention of the Internets, people were rumored to make art such as Unicorn Orgy, IRL. They used boulders, ripped-up fursuits, and semen. At present, all the craftsmen who aren't dead are pot-smoking hippies who can't use computers and forty-year-old women who create over-priced and poorly-made knitted stuffed animals that drain your PayPal if you're stupid enough to buy one, rendering this section unnecessary and a hindrance to the entire site.
Traditional Art - By far the largest section of DA, probably because pencils are cheap, this is where users place their painstakingly-renderedanime/furry/inflation arttracings with blotchy graphite shading. Others attempt to exploit the versatility of MS Paint to project a political message of some sort. (If you click on the link, try not to shit yourself laughing, as that would be rude). It's also the category for drawings made by people who are too fuck-tarded to use computers and art programs. Also, it is a well known fact that people who are too cheap to buy a tablet are probably also too cheap to buy a scanner. For this reason, most traditional "art" is uploaded in the form of a blurry, unfocused picture.
Photography - The skill of an average deviantART photographer... Thanks to the advent of ubiquitous digital image capturing, every 16-year-old girl and their little brother thinks they're Ansel-Fucking-Adams. These people usually can't draw. To facilitate this movement, DA created the photography section. It was promptly populated by camwhores afflicted by Internet diseases. Remember, Lens flare gives you 10 times more popularity! Any and all other photographs are of uninspired things (try photographing a tree, it's sooooo deep, man) and naturally receive about 100 favorites within a few seconds of their posting. HDR photos are automatically awarded a Daily Deviation and receive over 9000 faves no matter how shitty they are (BECAUSE IT IS SO SURREAL LOL). Then there are camwhores who think they're SUPER DUPER SPECIAL because they take pictures of their horsies and think people are jealous of their awesome pets when they can be doing things more productive with their boring lives.
Prose - NOBODY on deviantART knows what prose means. While poetry focuses on the surrealist interpretations of cutting, prose mentions every detail of your 30 minute cut-a-thon, and later goes into how nobody from school understands your scars, and how your gf/bf/ff left you because you're a pathetic, whiny attention whore. Any and all good criticism given of prose on deviantART will (without exception) be written off by the whiny TARTlet as you being a troll, since 99% of all prose on DA is apparently written by the same syphilitic leper. The truly great prose of deviantART art is overlooked because it is too long and/or too complex for the average 16-year-old.
Desktop Capture - ALL dA users are just not up to speed. Unable to produce even the most crude stick-figure scrawlings of "tasteful" furry or Invader Zimfanart? No need not feel left out! Simply mash your overly large, greasy thumb onto the printscreen key will capture your amazing desktop! Now you can receive praise and glory based on your interesting desktop background and show everyone online that you are a cool cat with all the latest icons. Mozilla Firefox is mandatory; don't even bother otherwise. Also, lacking a World of Warcraft icon loses you serious points. In order to boost your hxc points, having your icons in no particular order helps you score, too. Remember, organization is for n00bs! This category is also where trolls post screencaps of comments in which they, "lulz totally pwned this lolcow".
Flash - Why DA decided to host Flash-based animations is anyone's guess. The only users who submit Flash works on DA are failures (and divas) who couldn't get on AlbinoBlackSheep or even Newgrounds. The majority of these creations usually involve ninjas or absolute shit such as dress up games. There are also "Create your Own Sonic OC" and "Create a Wolf" games.
Three Dimensional Art - At the mention of the words "3D art", you're probably thinking "u meen liek XBAWKS graffiks" or Toy Story quality work. You will not find any of that on DeviantArt. Instead you will find Poser-generated bullshit and Second Life screenshots, which equates to playing with Barbie dolls except with less facial expressions.
Fractal Art - To put it simply: Push button, receive blobs of colors. Although the actual concept of fractal geometry far is too complex for most people to understand and (surprise, surprise) devianTarts are bad at math.
Tartlets (also known as Deviants) can choose what kind of Deviant they want to pretend to be by choosing from a drop-down menu. They are listed here in order of increasing offensiveness.
Regardless of type, however, all tartlet usernames must have references to wolves, the moon, Sonic the Hedgehog, be a character from any video game, or end with -chan.
The Artist (Artifex faber) - Constantly banhammered for displaying none of the above characteristics and wanting a place to share their art, the Artifex faber population has experienced a sharp decline, becoming an endangered species relegated to a life of struggling to feed and clothe themselves and their 17 year-old, 8-month-pregnant girlfriend. Many have fled deviantART to more quality-oriented art sites like Storm Artists. However, it is still believed this form of Internets artist will become extinct by next year. Van Gogh, Da Vinci, and Michaelangelo are spinning in their graves because of this. also has a form of incurable Artism
The Addict (Sucis chumpicus) - Tartlets who spend all day on deviantART in the complaints forum or the help with life forum complaining about how much everything on deviantART sucks. They are known for updating their journals every 4 hours, telling you about their personal high-school life as if you cared.
The Daz Dialer (Gigantus titus) - Talent-less hacks who got a hold of Daz 3D [a 3D rendering program], stole some female models or used the default female model [known as Genesis], stole some pre-made assets, dialed the female model's breast and/or ass size to 1000%, set up the model and assets like a diorama, clicked the "Render" button, submitted it to DevianTART and called it a day. This kind of trash will make views, favorites, and fans starving, actual artists can only dream of. Many making in excess of 10,000 views from horny 13 year old retards looking for a quick set of unrealistically gigantic tits to jack off to.
The Attention Troll (Gobblus atticus) - Those who make dA slightly more interesting, providing comments of both controversial and plain annoying natures to provoke responses from those who are willing to post multitudes of journals (i.e furries and any other member of the 'whores' family, such as Favewhores, dAmnwhores, etc.). They are also the only reason someone joins that shithole of a site. This specific type of troll originates in the forums, sometimes from other sites, and they most commonly evolve out of sheer boredom. A common characteristic is to stalk admins who then reject them, leaving the troll in a state of site-hatred. They often flee to ED and make pages concerning the admins.
The Favewhore (Amorae ubiquitus) - A Deviant who goes around adding every single submission of another's gallery into their favorites gallery, and everything that goes into their message inboxes.Amorae ubiquitus usually has little or no deviations, or fucking huge galleries full of crap made in MS Paint, or stolen art. Typical comment by these douchebags: "OMG LIEK KAWAIII NEKO DESUDESUDUES!!111". Some also go around adding every single submission on the front page into their favorites, then sets up a donation widget were PEOPLE ACTUALLY FUCKING GIVE THEM MMOOONNNEEYYYY FOR FAVING. And 256 people watch the person, even though they only have one journal with a video that they didn't even make. And when they're called out for it they just deactivate and make a new account. Typical profile page: A bunch of hidden comments because they don't want to accept the fact that a favewhore is what they've become. They also never comment, ever.
The Wallpaperist (Muro faber) - Deviants who believe that running a random script through a 3D-gen program and adding text makes them "interesting". The most common specimens of Muro faber are 13-year-old boys, who just don't know what the fuck "interesting" is, or 20-year-old boys who still think it makes them "interesting".
The Litigious Crumpet (Imma gonna sue-a ya assa offa) - Artist who will go batshit insane if any of her pwecious images have been severely altered (i.e. turned into an icon for a forums board or even passed around period, because what's even worse than having your images cut up by MSPaint?) and threatens to sue people utilizing the oft-abused weapon (and often yiffed by Furries) called the "Digital Millennium Copyright Act" (DMCA).
The 20+ Retard (Sophmorus obsoletus) - A clear example of general community taste. Ow. A Deviant who claims to be over 20 years old but draws and types like a 3-year-old. If you give the least bit of criticism or even no criticism, they will block you, flag the comment as spam, or hide the comment.These people usually fall for the most obvious trolls and always try to make any argument with a troll to their preferred point by blocking him after replying these people don't know that blocking is for pussies and they get buthurt over the most little reasons if there is any reason. The only people that like these types of artists are other such crappy artists or ones that have no art in their gallery and have no idea what art is. These types of people are usually 3 year olds posing as adults, or genuine adults who have a mental/social disability such as autism or aspergers. These adults like to entertain the idea that they're an artist, while they make no improvement or progress in their skill over years. It's obvious they rely on deviantART as their only means of socialization, sanity, and self-esteem; with the amount of time spent on the site, their lack of social skills, and their whiny attention whore behavior making remarks in streams, comments, even their own journals about how much they suck/everyone hates them/no one is paying attention to them.
The Flash Maker (Fulgore faber) - 13-year-old boy who make boring looped Flash animations of random subjects that consist of five frames and run for ten seconds. Otherwise, they make countless dating game simulations featuring stick figures or tracings from Dragon Ball Z so that they can fap to them. These tartlets usually belong on YTMND or Newgrounds but some migrate to deviantART for additional attention-whoring.
The "Draw Something Else Already" Fetishist (Copaepastus unoriginus) - People who make and submit absolutely nothing but pictures that portray their main fetish(es). They're much worse than your typical tartlet, especially if they consstantly rub said fetish(es) into other people's faces.
The "Draw Something Else Already" Fetishist in action: A pandering, try-hard, indecisive, autist, furfag shill that draws nothing but shit tier lesbian, bdsm, or furry porn [usually a combo of the 3 and more] and will spam it to your face by spreading it [and his OCs] everywhere like AIDS.
dAmnwhores (Audarae filia) - 13-to-16-year-old girls who frequent deviantART's chatrooms. Unlike the forums, the CHAT is teh most denjerus place in deviantART. dAmn (deviantART Messaging Network) is inhabited by camwhores, pedophiles, azns, white men, crackwhores, stoners, filipinos, and George W. Bush.
The Camwhore (Vidarae filia) - 16-year-old girl who've evacuated from MySpace shutdowns and timeouts in favor of the deviantART shutdowns and timeouts. They herald their existence by flooding the front pages with crappy webcam shots of their ass and graduate to posting thinly-veiled shots of their vagina under the pretense of 'Artistic Nudity'. Naturally, they get almost as many Daily Deviations as The Pornographer.
The Hybrid (Portmanteau) - A fairly common but equally pretentious breed of Tartlet who is an incestuous inbred combination of significant traits deriving from all, or a select few of the other deranged types of 'Deviant'. They herald delusions that only their twisted ideals hold value, and if said view is confronted, they attempt to suck the fan/fapping sympathy of DeviantART's community teet through worthless Journal venting whenever an emotional surge occurs in their otherwise pathetic lives.
The Hybrid in action: Member; A whiny little bitch/The "Draw Something Else Already" Fetishist.
The Pornographer (Penis puer) - These are photographers who are convinced keeping nudies in their gallery that "AWESOME, HOLY SHIT, DID YOU SEE THOSE TITS!?" will get a Daily Deviation every week as they, meanwhile, vigorously defend their right to post their boobs, their sister's boobs, their dog's boobs, your mom's boobs, Janet Jackson's uni boob, or whomever's boobs until kingdom come. It should here be noted the admins agree with this notion: pictures of boobs and vaginae are just intensely artistic (IMPORTANT: Admins also agree that male nudity similar in nature is not covered under this, due of course to blatant gayness). Emo boys also fit into this group because they believe that taking a sepia-toned picture of their ugly face and greasy hair and blasting it with the dodge tool is "hot" or "artistic." Then they upload their abominations to the nudity section, much to the pleasure of Ville Valo fangirls. Swedish dickheads like Yoshaki and Limpurtikles seems to enjoy watching 16-year-old girlgetting tied up.
“
The base is there, but the execution is rather lackluster.Her bosoms need to be more brimming. Let the chest be your canvas and inspiration your brush. In fact, if you're a healthy female of breeding age, maybe I could teach you the ways of an art connoisseur over dinner. Have you ever had dinner with an artist? I bet not.
So, even though you haven't asked me yourself, I might as well tell you the gloomy details and get the whole thing over with. I'm 18 years old, I have dark hair, I'm a little over six feet tall, and I have green eyes, a car, and a country club membership. These are all desirable traits that fertile adults seek to propagate. Get back to me.
„
—AgentRuble, an art connoisseur and pedophile, asks a 13 year-old loli to develop her art and bosom. No, really, see for yourself.
The Drive-By Propagandist (Shitbaticus insanicus) - These cunning deviantARTlets spew their unwelcome propaganda on their galleries and journals, and attempt to silence anyone who dares question their backwards logic.
The Sonic Recolourist (Velocitas colorare) - These so-called 'artists' take screenshots from Sonic the Hedgehog games and shit all over them to form redSonics, yellow Sonics, blue Tailses and lime green Shadows. (See Also: the cross-over effects of the emo movement evidenced by Mario's fabled brother "Luigi" shifting from his classic green composure to the less Nintendoesque "Pink vs. Black" so favored by said fucktards - user LironDe /Removed/) They are easily enraged by statements that contradict the "incredible originality and brilliance" of their artwork and are quick to accuse others of "stealing" their "Green Sonic" fan-character, despite the fact that Sonic artists are only aware of 8 colours (black, white, red, green, blue, pink, yellow, and cyan.)
The Fandom Retard (Maria suezae) - Branca, self-proclaimed wife of Stuart Tusspot, from Gorillaz. These people only go around drawing animu, making flashy animu "art"of characters fucking their mother's sister's brother, creating sophisticated, stylistic portraits of males from Shojo such as Fruits Basket and joining crappy clubs but insist they're not furries or retarded. For most, this is a temporary larval stage lasting until the age of 16 and metamorphose into Instagram whores, furries or pedophiles. They can usually be found plagiarizing, defending and kissing the ass of people who fit in The Popular Ass category, or, rarely, like Zeriara, becoming jealous of them and drawing kill art of their characters. Occasionally, these insufferable weeaboos also post shitty fanfiction, which, predictably, is a re-upload of their collections from FanFiction.Net. The theory is that the more sites they post their ficshit on, the more their e-peeni will be stroked. If they gather more attention, epileptic orgasms ensue. Typically, if fanfics are well-written (even more rare on DA than on Fanfiction.net), they will be porn masquerading as fine literature. These are the examples:
The Fatass (AKA 'Fat/Inflation Artist') (Fattius asinus) - These so called 'Fat-Admirers create inflated or grossly-overweight depictions of pre-existing or original characters with MSPaint's curve tool, or are manually drawn in pencil. They will ruthlessly defend their "art," calling their personal army of friends for support at the first sight of a negative comment. Unfortunately, fatasses continually subject innocent people to Eyerape with their awful artwork, and must be stopped. These fuckheads really need to draw something else for a change.
Proof how the members of the XNALara community are very nice and the most polite people that ever existed.
The Furry or "Anthro Artist" (Yifficus totalis) - JollyJack,ttly NOT Pornz u gais!!! Also ttly not copied. These usually cause the most drama by whining about how much everyone hates their fursonas and getting their art stolen by ten year olds because only THEY own the copyright to lemurs/huskies/redpandas/dicknippled nine-tailed vampire fairy badgers/ad infinitum, so they delete all their pictures only to make a new deviantART account soon after.
The Flaggot (Banius pedocunteus) - The term flaggot, unknown outside of UrBanned Dictionary before the advent of TGcomix and his brand of self-righteousmartyrdom, is a term used to describe bastards who have the gall to report Saints who have done absolutely nothing wrong. Overlooking a pedobitch who failed the psychological test for a sex change operation regularly using a portmanteau of "faggot," what is a flaggot? Well, to trannies who march in a one-person trap-parade 24/7 and cry oppression like a bicurious teenage girl, a flaggot is anyone who reports your lolicon lifts. This incestuous lovechild germinates into an organized effort by a cabal of homophobes on a site which regularly features GBLT to get the admins, many of them passing as homosexuals, to ban someone who is as wanted as a boner at a Purity Ball. For less schitzophrenic generalizations about this particular breed of DAer, see all of the preceding and successive categories. Typical comment: Comment marked as spam.
The Cosplayer (Imbicilae in costumus) - Typical cosplaying pokéfag These tartlets are actually stupid enough to get a professional photographer to take pictures of their fantastic costumes their comatose grandmother made them. The average age of the cosplayer is 24. Not surprisingly, some cosplayers give up their heterosexuality to fit in with their chosen character, and, knowing many tartlets, will give up theirs to be like their idols. Too bad they don't have a professional photog. Unless you're a famous cosplayer of EPIC WIN, you can attract pornographers armed with HUEG cameras to shoot you more than OJ Simpson can. A perfect example for this kind of cosplayer is Alodia or blackmage9 - a coswhore who is freakingly famous in her country and also some sort of a celebrity in the internet. Alodia is about to dominate the world with her "kawaii" (a.k.a. sexual charm) talent to seduce every stalking fucktard so they can buy her prints and bid a shitload of Jewgold for all of her used stuff.
A subset of this tartlet is the The Poseur (Passuer imagica thuivery) who is stupid enough to plagiarize a set of images from the same cosplayer (preferably famous or in professionally-made attire), or a combination of several different cosplayers' images, regardless of nationality, body type, facial features, or even gender. The best part is that people accept the dupe as genuine, leaving rave comments and expressing their appreciation of the imposter's "talents."
The Emo Poet (Plagiralus emotalis) - These are the people who are too stuck-up to bother with either Facebook or LiveJournal because they believe they are artistic. They can often be found redistributing copypasta from vampirefreaks, trying to seem hardcore. A recently discovered relative of this species is Monglus Canus, commonly know as the Dogmongler.
The Emographer (Vidarae filia emotalis) - Similar to the Emo Poet, these deviants deem themselves superior to their Facebook/LiveJournal counterparts, but does not differ a lot from their roots, as they enjoy posting pictures of them cutting themselves and then sucking up all of the pity that the internets has to offer.
The HXC Moshgrapher (Br00talis XXXila) - Moar 13-year-old boy who upload photographs of themselves and their HXC mosh pit crew fighting ghosts at local hardcore shows. Normally stolen from Destroy All Lines, These emo zubs will threaten with gangrape and epic flaming if their lens flare spin kick br00tal XXX mic steal pics are criticized. Note the sweat, blood (from razors) and semen on the lens.
ED Crew (Anonymus lulzae) - The lurkers of deviantART who dig up all the glorious lulz and tell the truth about this place. Be they banned or spurned, these dedicated men and women pursue their intended targets with constant vigilance and unwavering dedication.
Cheerleaders of Anonymous (Anonymus lulzae pussia) - Some users of deviantART, being namefags of sorts, fear teh banhammer, but will indirectly participate, or at least cheer, from the sidelines as frontline Anonymous kill the faggotry with fire. True Anons are encouraged to rape them until they stop being pussies and join in the fun. Some even act as if they knew anonymous all their lives.
Members - Also known as "normal" tartlets, they are ubiquitous, and can be found in even the deepest pits of deviantART. Members are mostly whiny little bitches, furries and fags that post everything about their lives in their journal on a daily basis. This group mostly consists of retards who assume that posting shitfan art every single day of their pathetic lives will make them famous. They also hope to be promoted to senior members or admins, but don't realise that even deviantART rejects retards as potential material.
Subscribers - (CORE members) - Although rare, this level contains the closest thing to real artists that deviantART has. These people are fucktarded enough to give deviantART money in return for additional features, and their payments form the bulk of deviantART's income. The adminz treat them as if they were their children, protecting them from anything that might harm them, but once they realize the truth and show signs of it, the moderators will drop the banhammer on them before they can spread the truth. Once banned Subscribed tartlets will beg, scream and cry for their money back, only to be told to Stfu and GTFO.
lolly This demonstrates where the subscribers' money goes.
Are you sure you don't want to subscribe?
What happens to all the money.
wait, how many of you live with your parents?
As you can see, those who obtain a subscription from their asspatters are better people than those who use their hard earned cash to purchase one.
Beta Testers - Beta Testers are a sub-species of Subscribers and are also a source of deviantART's income, but instead of getting more goodies than the subscribers, they actually work for deviantART by testing their new features. The only reason anyone would choose to be a Beta Tester would be for the symbol or to get closer to becoming an admin.
Senior Members - Senior Members are either really old people who have been tartlets for at least 100 years or former administrators. Noone really likes seniors but they pretend to like them in order to become Seniors themselves. The rules are simple on how to become a Senior Member on deviantART, mostly because the admins were too fucking lame to come up with anything more original than ripping off Fight Club [4]. There are two types of Senior Members on deviantART:
The Attention Whores who think they are PILLARS OF THE CUMMUNITY and must sexually involve themselves in everything and everyone. These members are easily noticeable by their appearance everywhere and their constant positive attitude towards everything. They would smile, even in the face of a black person who was about to rape them and steal their car.
The Internet tough guys who like to run around and troll everything they can find. You'll often see them in the forums or chatrooms telling people to "fuck off" or "take the knot." But the moment one of their admin friends are attacked, they rush in head first. These Senior Members are the worst kind, since no matter what they do or whoever they butthurt, they will not be banned EVAR because they perform various sexual acts for the admins.
This is a typical Admin and Senior Member relationship.
CEO - User Spyed Not even sure is this is a bot or a lazy admin
Advertising - A bunch of nobodies, who let photoshopped disasters onto the site as fail advertisements. They got in trouble for letting Pornographic advertisements onto the site.
Community - The people who answer the report tickets
The ones to take note of are as followed:
RealitySquared or more commonly called "RetardedSquared". Not only does he completely ignore copyright laws, but he condones tracing, screenshots of copyrighted anime and manga, and people posting their penises and vaginas onto the site as "nude arts". Getting a reply to a report from him, is a sign that The report won't end well. He is also said to be finding loopholes to keep tracer GothicVulpix on the site.
dxd one of Retardedsquares minions. Not a good admin to get in a report. HE most likely became an admin after sucking on RetardedSquare's tiny dick.
y2jenn Whiny Tumblrtard Social Justice Warrior of the group. Don't expect good help if she banned you. You might as well be talking to clever bot. She also has the tendency to now pick through and balete works she doesn't like. Edit: It seems that if she bans you for good reasons and you try to appeal she will sic her minion on you and attempt to sue your asshole for questioning her authoritah!
kozispoon one of the most retarded admins ever. She will blatantly ignore important details, and don't expect a block evasion case to go right when she replies to it
The most commonly predictable trait exhibited is posting shit in the finally finished forum. Here, Admins and partially skilled professionals will give honest critiques, and from here the lulztrain leaves the station when any Tartlet either:
Defends their art
Tells the admins how mean they are
Masturbates
Tells themselves they are talented and eats a tub of Ice cream
Or just writes it off and continues to post their EPIC Failures.
Laughs
Commenting and Favoriting
Commenting on a deviation means giving a completely dishonest opinion of it - if the deviation happens to be just a pile of MSPaint shit, the comments it receives usually say: 'I dig your style' or 'This is so awesome FAV'D++'. Meanwhile, a Favorite is used when a deviant can't even be arsed to write a single word.
The usual reaction to someone's opinion. Note the cry for help and the number of comments received.
If you don't want the world to know, don't make it public.
Wrong Way
No.
"I must say, this is a striking image. It possesses such a bright, color-rich atmosphere and I just can't take my eyes off of it. However, I think you could have invested more time in defining the proportions during the early stages of the work because one of the girl's hands appears slightly larger than the other, even though it's further away. You may also want to consider the placement of light sources in the picture before applying the shading. While the light really brings it to life, it's coming from the wrong direction. Setting that aside, I think it's a beautiful picture. Keep up with the good work!"
Or
"This seems to have taken a good amount of time and I've seen improvement in your work. The only thing I can mention is the proportions are a bit off. I saw a lovely tutorial on proportions with expressions here [link]
Good luck and I think with a little more work you'll be even better! :)"
Right Way
"cool."
"First comment!"
"OMG SOOO CUTE!! *hugs*"
"HNNNNNNNNNNG *dies of cuteness*"
"AAAAAAAAAAH THIS IS SO WRONG!!!ONE". (Add more than 20 emoticons of your choice for full effect.)
Posting Links to ED on DA
It seems when someone posts a link to any ED article, DeviantART immediately gives you a spam prompt, thinking you're spamming the site. Oddly enough, just writing out "Encyclopedia Dramatica" doesn't trip the filter.
Aside from drawing animu, the primary goal of a tartlet is to obtain pageviews. Remember, kids: Attention is the most vital commodity of survival to the emofur girls that comprise the bulk of deviantART's population! Let's look at the following equation that was developed through intensive research:
Page views = Attention = BETTER THAN SEX?!
Pageviews are a terrible drug that can drive a tartlet to engage in all sorts of lies, trickery and treachery. The quest for pageviews creates great banquets of the drama on DA, where tartlets pull all sorts of stupid shit such as faking a mass suicide. Scientific research has proven that tartlets cannot reach orgasm without first acquiring over 9000 views of their traced fanart.This guide contained far more effective tactics and strategies for obtaining pageviews.
Of course, 99% of all human beings who are too fucking lazy to survive TL;DR ramblings, can just check out this submission for a brief explanation on how to become popularrr on deviantART.
Attention Whore can drop $20 to have their shit spammed until 500 dorks click it!
They cut the bullshit and just want your monies NAO!
Nobody can escape the ads.
Using a hitfaker can help too.
in case it's deleted, copy of 2006 cartoon on how to chase "fame" on dA
Groups
A relatively new way for "artists" to get noticed and amass pageviews. Groups are a weak attempt by the admins to give members a feeling of self-worth and general acceptance, thus why they're called "groups". They're basically a bunch of fetish junkies who want to up their popularity but posting their "arts" for other like minded individuals.
Daily Deviations
Just like winning the lotto, except your chances are improved by asskissing and the prize is in pageviews and flames, not money. Daily deviations (DDs) are artworks that have been featured for 24 hours, give or take a day or two depending on the server lag. Considering the quality of the daily deviations chosen (see right for an example), it’s no wonder that most admins with DD-picking privileges complain about being inundated with suggestions.
They also enjoy giving DD to stolen and edited art without caring about the original artist, suggesting that the person joins Deviantart to get the DD removed. Oh the love.
There is one DD that has held the title of "Most Important Daily Deviation to Exist" for quite some time now. Since January 01, 2009 to be exact. This DD holds such a title because of the amount of Lulz that ensued after it was awarded such an honor. The abomination that was the DD was simply known as McCreepy the Frog; moonbeam13 initially awarded the DD. It came about from some stupid fucking game that some idiot fucktart had created, the objective of which was to draw a frog with your eyes closed. Much butthurt ensued, with many crying heresy that such a shitpiece be featured. The next morning, moonbeam13 posted a journal explaining that she didn’t mean to award it a DD - it was to test out the new DD system, and she hadn’t removed it properly before going to bed. She then removed the DD. Soon after, Purpleblur re-awarded a DD to McCreepy the Frog, just to assert that mod powah is absolute and to stick it to the whiny bitches that actually wanted to see art. This makes it the only piece on dA that was deliberately featured for 48 hours straight, and thus holds the title of "Most Important Daily Deviation to Exist."
It takes literally one line of text to get a "Daily Deviation" on DeviantART.
Being a bad reference to the site (i.e. getting an Encyclopedia Dramatica article).
Putting crap in the wrong category.
Trolling (that's an easy one, especially now that tartlets don't have to BAWWWWW to the mods every time due to the recent addition of a "Report Spam" button).
Promoting warez.
Mocking Tom Preston, his followers, or any other sysop.
Contacting someone who has blocked you (place of contact has to be outside of their userpage, thus making the Block system utterly worthless).
Trolling the forums complaining about how Fanart should not be featured (it should be killed with fire). Be prepared for incoming eBaumfags, weeaboos, and artfags. Many lulz and drama will ensue.
Making screenshots that aren't properly censored (According to RetardedSquared, they are all forms of "bullying" and therefore not allowed
Giving out constructive criticism or, really, criticism of any kind.
Many potential lulz exist when doing any of the above. The users and administrators do not like criticism of any form, people who are opposed to animeporn, and people who are in touch with the outside world. They prefer the type of people who will throw away money for the site (this act has been named "subscription")
It should be noted that if you laugh too hard at the artists on their site, you will be banned in spite of your subscription status. If you're a masochist/have nothing else to do with your life and decide to make a new account after getting banned, then the admins will hunt you down and ban your new account in between sucking Snapesnogger and Teruchan's dicks. In other words: why the fuck are you making a new account there in the first place?
The Points System
deviantART has a system of points that serve as on site credits, Tartlets often treat these points like gold and beg for them like a Jew. These points can only be used on-site, and it takes over 9,000 of them just to get even the most basic of uses out of them. Most Tartlets will start a donation pool to get more points so they can buy stuff. Points are commonly exchanged for even more Llamas, and there is even an exchange dedicated to the trade of worthless Llamas for points, most Tarlets are unaware of this system and will often beg for points on their page in exchange for Llama's, comments, watches, faves, and even commissions.
Llamas
Someone kill me now.
In late March of 2010, deviantTART added a new feature guaranteed to cause more idiotic drama. Llama badges. These stupid things are now worth more than pageviews, as a they have spawned numerous groups and pages of people clamoring for them. As an added bonus, the badge levels up as you receive a certain number of them, which makes every TARTlet want FUCKING MOAR!!!. Not so recently an addition was made to the Llama madness when DeviantART added the ability to literally buy accessories for your Llamas along with the llamas themselves. In an effort to control the madness DeviantART added an annoying Spam Filter, which popped up after giving a few dozen llamas, to provoke even more drama DeviatART decided to replace the filter message with a different one telling users they didn't have enough points to complete the transaction and requesting them to purchase more points.
As of January 2011 many deviants received a rude awakening to the struggles of the real world, when DeviantART started to penalize Deviants for accepting "Fraudulent Points" from other members on the site. This resulted in the first official DeviantART Debt Crisis of the current recession. This lead many of deviantART's beggars and businesspeople to be put into debt with their negative point balances.
A typical tarlet donation pool.
Trends and stupid events
Adoptables
These things are the disease of deviantart that Jew use to get watchers or points. every furry on deviantart has made one in their time. Adoptables usually have a system where you give the fugly mismatched coloured character a name then draw it in your style. It usually results in butthurt failures crying because [insert username including the word wolf here] did not draw the doggie within 3 days of "claiming" it. The other way is to send points that they use to buy other even uglier designs. Users that make adoptables cry if you insult their pretty designs... hint hint.
Merchandise
Want to show your dA pride? Now you can buy shirts, hats, and much more with deviantWEAR! Yes, with designs like "Pageview Whore" you will truly be the envy of your friends… if you had any. When the obviously poor Tartlets complained that the Jewish $taff was only in it for the money, they began to sell Trollface merchandise.
As of May 2013, you can no longer buy merch from DeviantART. Problem, internet?
BUY OUR SHIT THAT WE HAVEN'T EVEN MADE OURSELVES NAOW!!
Almost instantly, whiny teenage emos overran the Help Desk, Help Chat and Complaints Forum, asking essentially the same thing: "Why is my icon a So i herd u liek mudkip?" When these butthurt "artists" attempted to revert their icons back to normal in order to accurately reflect their individuality and unique-isity, their efforts were met with a strange error message:
Two years after the Mudkips incident, deviantArt tried again to make an April Fool's joke, and failed again, unless somehow provoking unbridled amounts of rage and whining is their idea of a reaction to a successful prank. This time around they replace everyone's icons (and signatures as well this time) with Twilight and Lady Gaga-based stuff, possibly due to any reasonable person going "WTF" in the face of such things.
Just in time for the 2010 Holiday Season, deviantART decided to add a search limit to the number of results a person can see. This resulted in almost immediate RAGE by the DeviantART community, once they realized they could no longer view hidden masterpieces of the wonderful worlds of Pokémon, Twilight, Harry Potter, Naruto, and Vocaloid. This resulted in many Internet Protests on and off the site and a surge in Forum activity, to which the admins said that they really didn't give a fuck.
April Fools Day 2011
DeviantART, in their never-ending search to please the ten-year olds that inhabit the site, somehow found out about Trollface, and decided to completely fuck it up.
They put images of the infamous character everywhere, in order to piss off the smart tartlets, because they couldn't read their messages and no one could see their art.
Since everyone knows clicking things makes it go away, our beloved Troll face was assaulted by thousands of mice that fateful day. Little did these heartless criminals know, doing so would only lead to a message explaining the prank, which completely ruins the idea
2012 - The Furry Uprising
Deviantart, being the slow-as-fuck little inbreds they are, decided to appeal to the cat lovers of the internet by making cats the "main thing", they had a window pop up every 20 seconds, informing you about "mandatory cat education", by including small cat-related facts , and forced every user to create cat-related art, to appease the cat hitler, or else their little demon mascot would be killed. Upon clicking the popup, you were met with a picture of cat-hitler, and this message:
“
Greetings minions,
If you're reading this, then our ploy was a success. After years of demeaning ourselves in cat .gif animations, being forced to nyan through space, and having our vicious battles with ribbons and soda boxes videotaped for all see, our patience has finally paid off. You may think we're adorable. You may love us. But it's all been a ruse, and the time has come for action.
Let us explain.
I am `MajorGeneralWhiskers. My hobbies include sleeping on your face, making claw-graffiti on leather couches, and seeing how far I can kick litter outside the box. I lead the Feline UpRising, also known as FUR. We're an army of expert cat hackers and script kitties who have been working tirelessly to take over deviantART. We even reduced our sleep schedules to a scant 17 hours per day, and it's all paid off. Now that we've seized control, we'll be making a few changes to make things more to our liking.
„
—The autistic deviantART team - Way behind on internet culture
Because managing a picture host for Sonic recolors and traced anime screencaps is The Internet is serious business, the DA admins have started a campaign for them to manage a Top Level Domain, and have submitted an application to ICANN. Currently the comments are either slavish cock sucking of the admins for e-points, or variations on "what the fuck are you thinking?"
UPDATE: It didn't work. LOL.
Removal Of The Search Bar On Favorites
Somewhere on August 2022, the retarded DA admins made a huge mistake, by removing the fucking search bar on favorites gallery. the reason is because it was "was expensive to operate and maintain—especially given its relatively low usage." how exactly something as simple as search bar is so dang expensive to maintain and operate? on the "relatively low usage" part, apparantly, the statistics included inactive accounts, which is just a useless excuse to remove the feature, when most active accounts used the freaking feature.
Because of this, if you have 9001 deviations on your (or other tartlet's) favorites, now you have to scroll infinitely or go to certain pages for finding one of deviations you favorited, have a good luck.
The fact that the announcement was posted as status update instead of journal means even the DeviantArt staffs are pussied out againts the backlash of the tartlets. There is a votation to restore this feature though.
And at least, Since June 2023, the favorites search bar has been restored.
Few moments later on the same day, because of the backlash of angry Tartlets againts the AI generator, the DA admins foolishly set all tartlet's deviations to opt out the 3rd-party AI image generators, except DreamUp itself.
The AI generator itself is nothing more than just a bunch of external AI image generators being shoved into a fucking blender to create this abomination, how original... NOT, because we all know that DeviantArt is notorious for being rampant on art thievery. Upon using DreamUp for the first time, you have 5 free prompts to generate the image. after running out, you'd have to buy core for moar promps, like DeviantArt is not greedy enough, ever since its downfall after the site was sold out to Wix✡ on February 2017.
Rules of deviantART
What happens if you let a horny retard go on deviantART
All male game or anime characters are in love with each other
All characters split into two versions when entering DeviantArt: normal and furry, and the furry version is always better than the regular one – cat ears are obligatory
All characters have child-like alter-egos, which I prefer, but not because I’m a paedophile
People don’t know there’s a Full View function, so I must inform them of it, and demand that they use it every time I upload something, no matter how crappy, by commenting “FULL VIEW PLEASE!!!!!!”
The whole world is only waiting for one thing: seeing menaked
It’s art if I say it is!
2,000 pageviews means I have to make a kawaiiiii picture thanking people for looking at my other kawaiiii pictures, preferably with as many hearts as possible
Comments any less positive than “OMG awesome!” must be considered flames, and even the slightest bit of criticism is worth starting a fight and getting banned over
The DeviantArt comments system is a great chatbox, especially if it’s someone else’s page!
No matter how crappy my art is, and regardless of the fact that no one would hang it on their wall to save their lives, I must still make all my art available as Prints
The human body is beautiful and never pornographic, even if it’s being penetrated anally by a furry’s cock
My profile icon flashes or moves, that means I’m a better artist than you
Submitting Deviations without commenting anything more than, “me again”, “lol”, “...” or “meh” is artistic
SUBMIT YOUR SHITTY ED-RELATED ART OVER HERE!!!!1
Moar info: furry art.
- Although rare, this level contains the closest thing to real artists that deviantART has. These people are fucktarded enough to give deviantART money in return for additional features, and their payments form the bulk of deviantART's income. The adminz treat them as if they were their children, protecting them from anything that might harm them, but once they realize the truth and show signs of it, the moderators will drop the banhammer on them before they can spread the truth. Once banned Subscribed tartlets will beg, scream and cry for their money back, only to be told to Stfu and GTFO.
- Beta Testers are a sub-species of Subscribers and are also a source of deviantART's income, but instead of getting more goodies than the subscribers, they actually work for deviantART by testing their new features. The only reason anyone would choose to be a Beta Tester would be for the symbol or to get closer to becoming an admin.
- Senior Members are either really old people who have been tartlets for at least 100 years or former administrators. Noone really likes seniors but they pretend to like them in order to become Seniors themselves. The rules are simple on how to become a Senior Member on deviantART, mostly because the admins were too fucking lame to come up with anything more original than ripping off Fight Club [4].
![A failed attempt at self promotion on Tumblr.[1] See upper right.](/images/thumb/5/5a/Selfpromo.png/120px-Selfpromo.png)
![How do I left DA? Araiya-Mintaka[2] shows us how it's done.](/images/thumb/8/81/Bawwwww.jpg/120px-Bawwwww.jpg)
![A failed attempt at self promotion on Tumblr.[1] See upper right.](/File:Selfpromo.png)
![How do I left DA? Araiya-Mintaka[2] shows us how it's done.](/File:Bawwwww.jpg)
![My OC. DO NOT STEAL!!!11!!!11!!1!![3]](/images/thumb/6/6d/Unoriginalyokoripoff.jpg/112px-Unoriginalyokoripoff.jpg)
![My OC. DO NOT STEAL!!!11!!!11!!1!![3]](/File:Unoriginalyokoripoff.jpg)
