Raoul DeMarest

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Defending Atheism with an insanity plee

Raoul DeMarest (AKA Atheism Defended) is a neck bearded Captain Birdseye lookalike who goes by the name Atheism Defended on YouTube, however, unlike the real Captain Birdseye, Raoul is a complete cunt who has spent virtually an entire year getting everyone on the website to hate him with astonishing success.

He thinks that all religious people have a mental illness which is almost poetic considering that he was a Christian for thirty years before he realized that he could better feed his victim complex if he became an atheist.

Now that he has effectively flushed his YouTube career down the crapper, he spends most of his twilight years blaming Richard Coughlan for all his troubles by making shit videos that nobody watches.

His stated plan for 2014 is to flag everybody that doesn't like him which means that he is going to be very busy indeed.

A Rising Star in the Making

Raoul wasn't always the YouTube equivalent of stepped-in dogshit being tracked across an expensive white carpet. There was a time when he was actually well thought of and respected. He gained endorsements from several popular YouTube users when others actually valued his opinions.

Just where did it all go wrong?

Mental Illness is Something You Never Recover From...

About midway through 2013 YouTube user Livelife8072 decided to be the person that year that would make a video series about how, in his opinion, all religion was a mental disorder. Unsurprisingly, like every other time someone has brought the point up, he got absolutely crucified for it when just about everyone pointed out that not one single medical journal classifies it that way and if they did it would mean that 95% of the of the world population is insane. Realizing the error in his thinking, LiveLife8072 recanted on his assertions and removed the videos. It was at this point that Raoul saw his chance.

Having seen the major ass-kicking that LiveLife8072 got, Raoul jumped right on in there and continued going where LiveLife8072 left off because, after all, what could possibly go wrong?

He was right about one thing. Arguing that all religion is a mental illness made him famous but not in the way that he was counting on...

Raoul DeMarest, the sanest mane on YouTube
Raoul DeMarest, the sanest mane on YouTube
Spot the odd one out

Answer: The dangerously obsessed delusional loon, intent on causing as much damage and taking as many people with them, in the middle is still with us.

An Unhappy History

When it finally started to dawn on people that Raoul was an epic bell-end with a really bad attitude problem, most were genuinely surprised. How could it be that such a mild mannered and friendly old man could become such a bitter old cunt? Well as it turns out, all the warning signs were there.

Raoul’s dad and his fishy flavored fingers

Raoul was born early in the last century, but sadly after any of the more meaningful and dramatic bloody world wars and conflicts. He had an unhappy childhood after his father ran away in fear of his life, having suddenly come to the decision that it was safer to provoke the wrath of the Italian mafia, than it was to spend one more day under the same roof as his psycho bitch of a wife. He eventually went on to become a famous fishing trawler captain, famed for his fish fingers made out of fresh tasty white cod fillet and was loved by everyone, everywhere.

Little Raoul was lucky to survive his early childhood because back when Raoul was a lad, in the Italian neighborhood where he grew up, children getting slaughtered was an everyday occurrence that nobody took any notice of. He was beaten up on a daily basis, constantly taunted and called nasty names by his own mother who was a raving lunatic basket case but even social services didn't like little Raoul so they left him with her to continue being viciously abused.

Raoul and Chunk, his only childhood friend

Eventually Raoul was found by some fat kid called Chunk that his mother and his brothers had kidnapped, and together, Raoul and Chunk escaped and went on an adventure finding a lost pirate ship full of treasure hidden in a cave under his mother's house. When Raoul got older he left home and joined the army, presumably with the blessings of his mother who longed for the day when she received a telegram informing her that her son had been shot in the head and had his brains blown out. He was eventually posted overseas on special assignment at a top secret military base where he met Robot Hitler and did top secret stuff that included guarding flying saucers and probing the anuses of little green men and cows. During his time there he joined a military uprising against an evil mad general which was all covered up by the defense department and is now so secret you would swear that he was pulling this whole story right out of his ass.

We do know that the bit about him joining the military is true though because he was part of the Northern California Veterans Meetup Group on meetup.com before the other veterans begged meetup.com to boot him off the website because of all the trouble he was causing. Seriously, these people spent their youth united as a band of brothers fighting little yellow people in jungles and across the Pacific and Nazis in Europe and staring menacingly across demilitarized zones at Commies but they couldn't stand another day with Raoul in their meetup group.

No Retreat

Once Raoul had started on the subject of religion being a mental illness he was determined to continue. Not only did he defend the position against relentless waves of criticism, he doubled down time and time again. His crowning moment of glory where he climbed into a lead lined fridge and waited for the atom bomb to go off was when he posted a series of videos involving a guy giving a university lecture on mental illness, where Raoul had added annotations to show how the points the guy was making related to religion. Raoul was then unceremoniously owned when someone contacted the guy giving the lecture in the videos about this and asked him about it, and the guy said that Raoul was talking shit.

Despite this, Raoul would not concede that he might be wrong and instead he doubled down even further and on top of this, his replies to people started getting really offensive. He eventually came to the conclusion that the reason that people didn't agree with him was not because he was wrong but because three quarters of the people on YouTube were mental cases.

It was only after several long weeks of calling all his viewers stupid faggots and retards that the true reason for all of his problems finally became apparent...

The Fall to the Dark Side

   
 
Anger, fear, aggression... the dark side are they. Once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny.
 

 
 

As Raoul went into a tailspin and plummeted ever downwards, ducking for cover in and amongst the scrapings at the very bottom of the big barrel of fail that is YouTube, several prominent and popular YouTubers made videos addressing his sudden change of character in the hope that all was not lost and amongst these was one by Richard Coughlan, otherwise known as coughlan616.

In his video Coughlan laid out all of the reasons why Raoul's audience was turning against him and offered him advice on how to turn it around. Naturally, as this is Raoul we're talking about and because Raoul is never wrong about anything, just as long as you don’t count that period of thirty years or so where he was a fundamentalist Christian apologist, which by his own assertions must mean that he was mentally ill, he told Coughlan where he can go stick his advice in the most polite way he could muster, in a way that didn’t include calling Coughlan a washed up talentless petty criminal and drug addict and telling him to get fucked.


Coughlan puts Raoul in his place

It was at this point that, when even his closest former friends and allies had abandoned him for fear of being badly burnt with the stupid that Raoul was engulfed in, he noticed that he still had one or two viewers remaining but these weren't ordinary viewers though. They watched Raoul's videos for just one reason and one reason only and that reason was that Raoul was saying nasty things about Richard Coughlan.

You see these viewers were the Anti Coughlan Taliban which is a retarded group of aspie obsessives who fixate about what Richard Coughlan is doing and then complain about it. Constantly.

Rise of the Dark Lord

With his army of literally two dedicated investigators which Raoul referred to as capital A Atheists (with the capital A presumably eluding to the fact that they are all HUGE assholes), Raoul set out to completely ruin Richard Coughlan's reputation by making videos and posting comments all over YouTube about how Coughlan was a drug addict, a petty criminal, and a whiney faggot which Coughlan completely denied. Naturally it didn't take very long for the counter attack when literally none of Coughlan's many fans leapt to his defense and viciously savaged all of Raoul's YouTube channels, torching them all in a bloody scorched earth flagging campaign.

To counter this, Raoul set up numerous backup accounts until he eventually had more backup accounts than he had actual friends, and this pleased him so much that he then decided to create more than one of them. Of course, being the strategic evil genius that he is, he announced his intention to do this beforehand so it came as no surprise, when all the people who thought that he was a faggot decided to lend him a helping hand and create some backup accounts for him too.

What also came as no surprise was that those people then used the backup accounts they'd created to start trolling other people as if they were actually Raoul by leaving comments on their videos calling them niggers for epic lulz which only got even more epic when everyone realized that it had taken several weeks for anyone to notice there was any kind of difference between a bunch of retarded trolls abusing the fuck out of people and Raoul just being his usual self.

The Siege of Raoul

Today, Raoul sits deep underground in his Berlin Bunker shouting at his generals in German, permanently under siege from the legions of Coughlans fans that constantly attack him and leave nasty replies to the abuse he leaves on other people's videos and down thumb and flag his videos, because when you set out on a yearlong campaign to alienate yourself from everyone else on the internet and insult and abuse everyone who has ever given you any help or advice, it's obvious that people are only attacking you as a result of them having some sort of loyalty to a part time stand-up comedian who works in a fish and chip shop in Glasgow never had a job.

Dead

While still unconfirmed, it is rumored that this old fart has finally made one with the grave, and went to see God so he now will spend an eternity in Hell. Good job on your late de-conversion, you old senile fool. I hope it was worth living one year in sin, just to get into Hell.

   
 
I have just been informed youtuber Atheism Defended has sadly passed away.
 

 
 

—Vindicator with a quote that proves that there is a god, https://twitter.com/Vindicator12/status/449982855893221377

Raoul Returns from the Grave

It can be confirmed that this piece of internet detritus is not dead. Recently, one of his many sock accounts on twitter became active. This was quickly denied by his butt buddies Vindicator and The MadShangi. Subsequently MadShangi has called out Raoul for faking his heart attack and having his wife call Vindicator and report his expiration.


   
 
Speaking of backstabbing cunts. Pretty shitty of you to fake your death.
 

 
 

—The MadShangi, https://twitter.com/MadShangi/status/498672291769626624

After (probably) having realized that Coughlan isn't fazed by his fake moral superiority, Raoul has (seemingly) switched gears to focus on the user UnseenPerfidy, tossing at him this lolzworthy gem:

*GASP!*

Raoul put up a response to Coughlan sharing the above image and Raoul, ever the cowardly denier of any wrongdoing, alleges that had one clicked on the avatar, they'd be brought to a page that wasn't him. Funny, though, that the only one who could prove this nugget of bullshit correct or not would be the recipient of the message. His video, one that clocks at thirteen minutes and forty-six seconds, is titled "The Coughlan Trolls celebrate the holidays ", is unlisted and thus only a link to it would allow one to view it. See if the following links to the fail video and, should it work, laugh at Raoul: The Coughlan Trolls celebrate the holidays on YouTube.

See Also

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