Jed
Jed is a batshit insane suicidal fuck who, completely incapable of actually becoming an hero, pretended to commit suicide by acting, over MSN, as his little sister who had found his own corpse, because we all know that the first reaction of little girls after just having found a relative's corpse is to hack into their instant messenger account and tell random people about it. The MSN account which he uses is [email protected], but it's common knowledge "Jed Fooly Cooly" translates from Japanese to "suicidal pedophile".
After the imminent butthurt caused by this pathetic attempt at whoring attention, he tried to approach his friends with the question "do u still pissed at me?", which is fail beyond the comprehension of mortals.
Unfortunately, Jed can no longer be reached on MSN. A brave Anon warrior convinced him to place the code n—a_Á—ay±m—a?ÁÇáç±Çáß±Çá§ÁaÇáDZOÇá—±Ç᧱Çár×ÁÇ á+NÇ áLáÇá into his Personal Message Bar...there by locking his account forever. Amen.
The Final Conversation with Jed
This conversation took place on MSN Messenger on August 3rd, 2007.
VodKa says: hey man, what's up?
Jed says: sup who are u?
VodKa says: My names Vodka, I belong to vampire forum
VodKa says: I heard people were fucking with you
Jed says: hmm about what?
VodKa says: idk...you've got an article on Encyclopedia Dramatica
VodKa says: do you know what /4/chan is?
Jed says: ohh that shit
Jed says: yea yea
VodKa says: yeah...well, i lied...i'm a channer...but i come in peace
VodKa says: this Anon will not hurt you
Jed says: whos anon
Jed says: wtfs goin on
VodKa says: Anon is /4/chan...the people who have been fucking with you
Jed says: does that thing on the encyclopedia say do u still hate me?
VodKa says: Eh, everyone pretty much still hates you...at the moment, they're scheming to bring you down big time
VodKa says: Don't tell anyone we had this conversation, or i'd be treated as a traitor to Anon
VodKa says: and we'd both be fucked
Jed says: wait wat
Jed says: no i wouldnt
Jed says: and i got ur back
Jed says: but whos all this
Jed says: is it ppl from habbo or wtf
Jed says: i dont even know those ppl i think
VodKa says: No man, they're people from 4chan
VodKa says: the same people who put your info on ED
Jed says: that was tom
Jed says: my old friend lol
VodKa says: http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/Jed theres your article
Jed says: lol i know what it is
Jed says: its from tom
Jed says: he showed me when he made it
VodKa says: hmmm
VodKa says: how often do people add you?
Jed says: WHAT THE FUCK
Jed says: some guy named john did
Jed says: but
Jed says: umm they added to that page
Jed says: i never said that shit
VodKa says: just a sec man
VodKa says: i've got other people loyal to protecting you
Jed says: but wat the fuck
Jed says: how are they gunna hurt me?
VodKa says: oh dude...did you not see the Fox News special on 4chan?
Jed says: i have no clue what ur Talking about u realise that?
VodKa says: they can find out where you live
Jed says: well then bring um
Jed says:
i dont know who they are
Jed says: but i can kick ass
Jed says: and so can my friends lol
Jed says: i have no clue who ur Talking bout
Jed says: or what ur TAlking about
- John has been added to the conversation.
Jed says: so ye
VodKa says: John Connor, here we go
Jed says: JOHN
Jed says: U SON OF A BITH
VodKa says: We are friendly
Jed says: i know him
Jed says: he added me
Jed says: lol
John says: aww
Jed says: john wtfs going on i dont understand
John says: do you still pissed at me?
Jed says: if people are coming to get me
VodKa says: John, let us be nice
Jed says: then i guess ill kill them
VodKa says: I have promised peace
John says: Vodka
John says: I think Vodka saw the article and added you
VodKa says: I am your overload on Chan
Jed says: i dont get what the fuck yall are talking about
Jed says: both of u shut the fuck up and tell me what the fucks happening
Jed says: and what the fuck chan is
Jed says: NOW
VodKa says: Okay, listen...
VodKa says: Now that you MSn addy is on ED...people can find out where you live with just your email address alone
Jed says: cool
VodKa says: once they find out where you live, they'll find your phone number
Jed says: yea?
VodKa says: and they'll call all hour of the day
VodKa says: non-stop
Jed says: then my parents will block the number
Jed says: lol
VodKa says: they'll send threatening letters
VodKa says: some will send anthrax
Jed says: OK
Jed says: STOP THIS SHIT
Jed says: IM SCARED NOW
Jed says: ALRIGHT
VodKa says: some will attempt to hack your computer
Jed says:
I DONT KNOW WHAT THE FUCK THIS IS
Jed says: IM FUCKING SCARED
John says: Vodka
John says: its no use
John says: I thought you were gonna be awesome when I read the article
VodKa says: yeah...even if i tell him, Anon will finally get to him :(
John says: apprently you're another douche on msn
VodKa says: huh?
Jed says: WHAT THE FUCK
Jed says: SHUT UP
Jed says: IM SCARED
John says: I thought Jed was gonna be an awesome /b/tard
Jed says: PLEASE JUST TELL ME
Jed says: UR FUCKING WITH ME
VodKa says: Dude, you're in serious danger
Jed says: PLEASE
Jed says: do i need to tell my parents
John says: yes
VodKa says: Go to youtube and check out the Fox News story on 4chan
VodKa says: and Anonymous
Jed says: OK LISTEN
Jed says: PLEASE
John says: does you dad have a yellow vam?
VodKa says: see what they're capible of
Jed says: PLEASE STP
John says:
- van
Jed says: why do they want to hurt me
VodKa says: WE'RE TRYING TO WARN YOU AND SAVE U!
VodKa says: Because they can...they don't care
VodKa says: They have your info...so they will
Jed says: what if i turn off this shit
Jed says: this account
VodKa says: Too late
John says: yeah
VodKa says: Chances are they've already found your address and information
VodKa says: they're quick
Jed says: DUDE
Jed says: PLEASE STOP
Jed says: IM CRYING
Jed says: STOP
Jed says: STOP
- mAtT has been added to the conversation.
VodKa says: Matt, he's doomed
VodKa says: I'm trying to tell him about 4chans plans to take him down
VodKa says: but he won't listen
mAtT says: who jed?
VodKa says: Jed...you know, the kid who got posted on ED
mAtT says: oh
VodKa says: the kid that Anon is gonna harrass
Jed says: listen
Jed says: im krying
Jed says: ok
John says: Vodka
Jed says: if itell my parents
John says: Anon just paged me
Jed says: i have no more internet
Jed says: and please
John says: he has some info
Jed says: just make him stop
Jed says: dont
Jed says: please
VodKa says: Dude, if you tell your parents Anon will get pissed even more
Jed says: im crying
Jed says: stp
mAtT says: assfucker
VodKa says: We can't stop them
Jed says: dude this isnt cool
Jed says: ill get the cops
mAtT says: ok
mAtT says: ese
Jed says: do u know where i live
VodKa says: the cops are paid by 4chan
Jed says: please stop
VodKa says: they can bribe the cops
Jed says: listen
mAtT says: 4chan controls the world
VodKa says: anon has unlimited funs, actually
Jed says: im not even in the country
VodKa says: i'm being serious
VodKa says: well, they'll burn down your house
VodKa says: they're very serious
VodKa says: real life: serious business
Jed says: DUDE DO U KNOW WHERE I LIVE
mAtT says: anonymous rules every nation
VodKa says: I don't...but they do
Jed says: ask them
Jed says: ask them now
Jed says: just so i know its real
VodKa says: and expose myself?!?!
Jed says: just so i know
Jed says: before i get all my parents
VodKa says: they'll take me down too!
Jed says: and all that
VodKa says: dude...it won't do any good
VodKa says: you're already screwed
mAtT says: whats going on here anyway?
VodKa says: i'm just trying to prepare you
Jed says: I CANT BE PREPARED
Jed says: IM A SCARED FOURTEEN YEAR OLD KID
Jed says: IM SCARED
Jed says: OK
Jed says: U SCARED ME OK
Jed says: IM FUCKED
Jed says: I KNO
Jed says: but just someone tell me where i live
VodKa says: We're not trying to scare you....we're tring to tell you the truth
Jed says: im bout to pass out
Jed says: i am
VodKa says: the truth is...they're going to get you
Jed says: IK NOW
Jed says: BUT ITS SCARING ME
Jed says: STOP
Jed says: ILL HELP HIM HACK
Jed says: I WILL
Jed says: ILL DO ANYTHING
VodKa says: you should be scared, you're gonna be trolled IRL
Jed says: JSUT DONT HURT ME
John says: Anon will get to you
John says: you're gonna be canceled irl
Jed says: ILL DO ANYTHING I SWEAR I WILL
VodKa says: your gonna be made into an hero
VodKa says: dude
Jed says: NO IM NOT
Jed says: STOP IT
VodKa says: theres nothing we can do
Jed says: STOP IT
Jed says: LISTEN
Jed says: ALL OF U LISTEN
Jed says: TO ME
mAtT says: anonymous is going to kill you
VodKa says: we're just warning you of your fate
Jed says: IM SCARED OK
VodKa says: we're listening
VodKa says: calm the fuck down
Jed says: DO U WANT TO TALK TO MY DAD
Jed says: I CANT
Jed says: IM GUNNA DIE
Jed says: IM FOURTEEN
VodKa says: Dude, even if we told your dad he wouldn't believe it...he'd blow it off as a bunch of punks playing a trick
Jed says: NO HES OVER PROTECTIVE
Jed says: IM SCARED
Jed says: when will i get the threats
mAtT says: wtf does IM C RED mean?
VodKa says: Hmmm...everything is planned for August 20th...
John says: Vodka
Jed says: DO U KNOW WHAT STATE IM IN
John says: wasn't it august 18 or did they move it again?
VodKa says: I don't but they do
VodKa says: they moved it
mAtT says: i thought it was the 19th
John says: oh ok
Jed says: LOOK ILL HELP U GUYS
Jed says: I WILL
VodKa says: nah, it's the 20th...they had to prepare the bombs
Jed says: im bout to throw up
VodKa says: heh
Jed says: STOP IT
mAtT says: TOP IT?
mAtT says: top it off?
VodKa says: listen, have you heard of murder cases across the nation that the cops couldn't solve?
VodKa says: have you? well...those are the work of 4chan
mAtT says: its because anonymous pays them off
VodKa says: they bribe cops and clean the seen of evidence
VodKa says:
- scene
Jed says: IM GETTING MY DAD
mAtT says: even your best friend could be anonymous
VodKa says: bring your dad
Jed says: ok are u going to fuck up my computer
VodKa says: maybe we can save you still
VodKa says: no
VodKa says: we're good anon members
Jed says: u...u can save me?
VodKa says: perhaps
VodKa says: but we can't make any promises
Jed says: dude is anything gunna happen in rl?
mAtT says: yes
VodKa says: yes
VodKa says: very much so
mAtT says: you better buy a dog
VodKa says: you see...anon has their hand in everything
mAtT says: and get curtains
VodKa says: black market guns, illegal drugs, and the sex slave trade
Jed says: ok what statess are they in
John says: are they Uzi's in the USA yet?
VodKa says: every state except Washington
mAtT says: theyre everywbere
VodKa says: They're in 7 countries outside the U.S. too
Jed says: listen
VodKa says: i'm serious...i know this because i've been an anon member for 6 years
Jed says: can u make it till nothing happens
Jed says: im only fourten
VodKa says: i can't
Jed says: im just a kid
VodKa says: we need to talk to your dad
John says: yes
Jed says: but hes my dad
Jed says: he will be mad
John says: its better than dying, isn;t it?
mAtT says: its the only way
Jed says: ok im getting him
VodKa says: guys, i hope we can save this fine boy
John says: I really don't see why anon wants to kill him
John says: I wish we could stop it
mAtT says: Anonymous has already ruled it
VodKa says: Yeah...:( we could be taken down just for warning him
mAtT says: we're risking our lives for you Jed
John says: so you better be graceful
VodKa says: did....did he kill himself? :(
VodKa says: jed, don't be an hero just yet!
mAtT says: Anonymous would be much displeased
mAtT says: Anonymous needs to kill him theirselves
VodKa says: jed, in order to keep anon from hacking your MSN or computer, you need to post this code into your Personal Message bar. n—a_Á—ay±m—a?ÁÇáç±Çáß±Çá§ÁaÇáDZOÇá—±Ç᧱Çár×ÁÇ á+NÇ áLáÇá
- Jed has left the conversation.
VodKa says:
r.i.p. jed :(
An hero?
It is known faggot Jed has killed himself.
Jed's famous quotes
- "do u still pissed at me?"
- "how tall are u both dick wise and height?"
- "by dey wey, i bloked yu"
- "luk at my mom on webcam and give her a rating out of 10 plz"
- "sumtimes i smoke cigarets but somtims i smoke paracetamol"
- "what if i fuck my dad?!?!"
Attempts at humor with this meme
Just like every unfunny internet meme, it happened that there were enough 13 year old boys who found this one funny for more than 12 seconds to have some image macros made about it. Not surprisingly, none of them are actually funny and some of them don't even make sense.
-
du u stil pisd @ me?
-
A nigger who is pissed off. Has nothing to do with the meme, but racial humor is automatically funny.
-
Hitler doesn't want Jews to be pissed at him.
-
They shouldn't stay pissed at him, he was only cleaning around!
-
Now this is a story all about how Jed's life got flipped, turned upside down.
