Lisa Portolese
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Lisa Portolese is a Failbook messiah brought to the attention of anonymous on September 10th, via the /b/ of a *chan that shall go un-named. She is an avid supporter of the search for popular lost loli Madeleine McCann, and thus very susceptible to trolling.
A natural troll-to-fanatic chemical reaction has now begun, and as a result, is currently releasing a high volume of the elemental byproduct LOL. Completely competent and credible sources believe that as this reaction continues, the young Fanatic may level up and become Lol-cow, a Pokemon of the leaf variety.
—Lisa Portolese, upstanding moral citizen | ||
The Trolling
Original message, sent via Facebook:
There once was a young girl called Maddie, She had such an irresponsible daddy, Snatched from her bed, She's probably dead, Raped by a Portuguese baddy.
Q: What's the difference between Madeleine McCann and Pope John Paul II? A: The Pope died a virgin.
Q: Knock Knock... Who's There? A: Not Maddie, lol.
The Response(s)
Crazy: I just want to let you know that I have reported you to the Police,
and they now have my facebook password so if there if there is some
reason that you would send that poem to me when I am only a
Volunteer and do not have anything to do with that family than
please notify me. The Police are already looking into all 53 of your
friends across the states and Isreal. I've been told you are Jewish
reform so I don't understand why you would send this poem out.
Especially so close to 9/11. I lost my husband that day. I went to
school in California, I travel there frequently, I am from Toronto
Canada, I will press every charge against you
possible, harrasement, terrorism etc. I strongly encourage you to
apologize to me, delete the poem from whereever you posted it, post a
message to your friends via notes explaining why they are being
questioned, if you do that, all is forgiven...you are either a young
stupid kid or maybe you are the killer, I don't know. how could I or
would I possibly know that. It is 12:29 EST, you hae exactly 3 hours
before I call Internationnal Crime Stoppers, message me back or send
an e-mail to [email protected]
Anon: hahaa ahahaahhahaa ahahaaha holy shit
Crazy: This is serious ANON, the Police are already here. Why did you write
the Poem? You are Jewish reform, how could you spread so much hate?
Facebook may disable your account soon.
ANON: ok ok ok I posted an apology go see it
www.lemonparty.org
Crazy: ok I will go have a look
ANON: Oh lawdy lawdy you so crazy
This crazy bitch actually added all of my friends and told them I
killed Maddy. Seriously
Embracing Of Insanity
After a while, the anon who began the original thread in question decided to introduce Lisa, or Litzi17 to his friends over at Something Awful Sycophant Squad. She became a den mother and hero of Cosby Cock, but alas, a meltdown seems to have taken her away once more. The meltdown also caused her to delete all her posts, which was retardedly ineffective as most of her posts had been quoted, lulz.
http://sass.buttes.org/forum/search.php?search_id=1824693341
—Lisa Portolese, dreaming about Maddy for 4 months | ||
Even Crazy Off the Subject of Maddie!
- I have a better photo than that. Much better photos for your jerking off pleasure. When I was 14 I had a job on a sex line and I've honed my craft over the years. Tonights game was excellent New York beat Toronto 9-2. beautiful grand slam and great plays by both teams, the odd thing was this....New York had 9 runs and 11 hits, so the score board read NEW YORK 9 11. Thought that was freaky. Listen I like to get really super kinky but after what my friend did with the facebook thing, I am somewhat shy because I don't know what other feeds this is going through so I feel inhibited. Plus Wednesday night is a holy day for me at Sun Down. On top of all that, I really find the Maddie pictures distasteful. So I don't know if I should be on this forum anymore, it is hard for me to get loose and let you dive into the attics of my mind and get into some deep sexual discussions while looking at a little child. I have never wanted my own children so looking at them really turns me off and makes it quite difficult to allow myself to explode. I don't like to get myself excited unless I know I can fuck myself really hard and make myself gush 8 feet into the air, I actually have a video of myself doing that, having a contest with a stripper friend of mine but she is already at 11 feet, we've measured the distance, wish I knew how upload the video. Would love if someone sent me a camcorder so I could let all of you tune in and watch me getting fucked up the ass by some big hard black cock while I am licking some chicks pussy and then forcing her to suck the shit off my mans cock but that is just the tame stuff, again, I don't want to say too much because I am not sure where it will be posted and my real name is all over the Internet.
- You know it's weird, I am a Pisces and I have always been really intuitive, even predicted the Whittier Quake, after that my teacher Karen Hensell who is still at the Academy and occasionally plays Sharons Mom and the Y and R, wanted to send me for testing. I made the mistake of blirting out my prediction. I digress, when I heard about Madeleine, I was having visions for lack of a better word that she was in Malta, 50 days later they reported sightings of her there. I got involved with the Forum because I have a friend Joyce Luciano who works for the FBI and is a natural born witch, she is on my profile on facebook, we needed Maddies Time of Birth to do a natal chart to try and determine if she was still alive, and while they have given me much information, they have not given me the time of Birth.
Fun Facts
- Evidently she has been in a movie. It consists entirely of horse porn.
- Anonymous doesn't know who he's messing with. She will put him in one of her "films".
- THE BITCH IS PSYCHIC!!1
- Lisa Portolese does blow
Quotes
- "I told you to call me! It is not fake. I am also a Baroness but that is another story entirely, I had my family crest on my site. I am a naughty princess. No one fun to play with anymore. George is fun but rather busy. He was great last night, we went out the back. Brad came out the front....I am not making this up."
- "I write music for bands, I sing, act, dance, just got a distribution deal for a screen play based on my crazy heritage."
- "I am not like them, we have the same diagnosis as does Linda Hamilton and Robin Williams.....everyone is different...... Winston Churchill had manic depression too, only I don't suffer from the depression, I just get really high and they have to keep me on downers. So give me some caffeine and it feels like I'm on coke."
- "and I am not the owner of the facebook site for Maddie, the kid that created the group was busy with family matters, his Grandfather is very sick so I offered to post things for him. He is in England, I don't know him. I just joined the group to see if there was something I could do. Progress has been made, there is no Amber Alert System in Europe like in North America, and Maddie's case has been used as a template for other missing children, even teenagers like some of you are. We live in a very different world now, I never had to worry about the things that you have to worry about. It makes me really sad. I know September 11th is going to be really sad at Skydome or Rogers Center as they call it now. I wanted to pay my respects. You were probably all too young to remember the devastation of that day at the WTC."
- "Oddly enough I have a hot date with a Portuguese man, I hope he has some pudding cocks for me to suck on."
Gallery
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WHEN THIS BABY HITS 88
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Lisa cleaning up after filming a scene from her latest film. Note the horse semen plastered on her face, which Lisa claims has "special rejuvenating powers".
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Lisa Portolese hanging out with PedoMan and ChinMan, popular 4chan memes
