The Virginmobile

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What bring dey Muszlims dey Virgins
Not to be confused with Virgin Mobile.

The Virginmobile is the TOW truck that brings virgins to all the good Islam boys once they get to heaven, not to be confused with Virgin Mobile.

If you are a virgin, you are said to be riding the Virginmobile. If you continue to ride the Virginmobile until your death, the truck will take you to your destination in heaven and you will be immediately banged (possibly in the ass) by some horny bearded terrorists in turbans.

If you only have oral and anal sex, you are a technical virgin: still technically riding the Virginmobile. However, you are actually being dragged behind the Virginmobile with the rope around your neck until you stop kidding yourself and let go.

The status of dedicated lesbians and bi chicks that have yet to drive stick is open to interpretation.

After the Great Slurpee Uprising of 2003, Osama bin Laden took over the position as the driver of the Virginmobile. It is unknown if the truck will ever reach heaven at this rate, due to George Bush's assertions that bin Laden does not know the path thereto.

Many LJ user are currently riding on the Virginmobile, including girlvinyl. It is speculated that their use of LJ is connected to this strange and wonderful vehicle.

Babies with Harlequin Icthyosis die while riding the Virginmobile. This is probably for the best.

The Virginmobile is part of a series on

Secks

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