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Belarus: Difference between revisions
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{{spoiler|Glorious Emperor saved Ryanair Flight 4978 from a terrorist bombing! Ungrateful EU imposes sanctions!}}<br><br> | {{spoiler|Glorious Emperor saved Ryanair Flight 4978 from a terrorist bombing! Ungrateful EU imposes sanctions!}}<br><br> | ||
[[File:Problema.jpg|thumb|right|Lukashenko is the first Emperor of the shire of Belarus, He has upheld an oath to take to the frontlines if any wise cracking American dares to plant a Mcdonalds chain.]] | |||
Belarus, officially the Republic of Belarus, is a landlocked <s>country</s> [[Russia|Soviet Puppet State]] in Eastern Europe. It is bordered by Russia to the east and northeast, Ukraine to the south, Poland to the west, and Lithuania and Latvia to the northwest. It has the dubious distinction of being controlled by foreigners more times than [[Poland|Poland]]. | |||
Countries that have owned Belarus include, but are not limited too; Russia, Lithuania, Poland, and even the Polotsk principality, whatever the fuck that is. | |||
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[[File:NOT GAY.jpg|thumb|right|600px|[[Faggot|Straight Belarussian Pride]] ]] | [[File:NOT GAY.jpg|thumb|right|600px|[[Faggot|Straight Belarussian Pride]] ]] | ||
[[File:Fistingbelarussian.jpg|thumb|right|proof Lukashenko loves Goatse ]] | |||
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The great Premier decreees that he will rather be dictator than be [[gay]]. Lukashenko defended the legitimacy of his re-election and vowed that Belarus would never have its own version of the Orange Revolution, in which every well built man must report in private to Lukashenko to prove his [[Goatse|manhood]]. | The great Premier decreees that he will rather be dictator than be [[gay]]. Lukashenko defended the legitimacy of his re-election and vowed that Belarus would never have its own version of the Orange Revolution, in which every well built man must report in private to Lukashenko to prove his [[Goatse|manhood]]. | ||
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<youtube>4dS9zUtMQsA</youtube> | {{center|<youtube>4dS9zUtMQsA</youtube>}} | ||
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On 23 May 2021, The Emperor of Belarus received a vision that a plane was in danger of being bombed. So he sent a MiG to "escort" the wayward craft to Minsk, the capital. | On 23 May 2021, The Emperor of Belarus received a vision that a plane was in danger of being bombed. So he sent a MiG to "escort" the wayward craft to Minsk, the capital. No bomb was found. As it turns out, the bomb decided to diffuse itself before suffering the wrath of the glorious Emperor of Belarus. However, as it so happens a reporter who was critical of the Emperor was on board. This dangerous fugitive was arrested and sent to be immediately <s>tortured</s> given hospital care. Roman Protasevich's [[lie|arrest had nothing to do with bomb threat]], he just happened to be on the plane in question. [[Superpower#EU|The EU]] then got butthurt and sent a very stern letter to Belarus [[Incontinent_Student_Bodies|crying like a little bitch]]. According to the EU, Belarus made up the bomb threat in order to have the plane land for the sole purpose of arresting this reporter, thereby putting their citizens in danger. [[𝕿𝖍𝖊_𝕵𝖊𝖜𝖘_𝖆𝖓𝖉_𝕿𝖍𝖊𝖎𝖗_𝕷𝖎𝖊𝖘|But we know the truth]]. | ||
{{timeline|Featured article May 24, 25 and 26, [[2021]]|[[Goth]]|[[Belarus]]|TBD}} | |||
{{commonwealth}} | {{commonwealth}} | ||
