Encyclopedia Dramatica:Article of the Now/September 7, 2021
Taxes The Supreme Court of the Jewnited States (commonly abbreviated as SCROTUS) are the nine kings and queens that rule the United States of Amerifat, and all of them are above the law, meaning niggers putting pubic hair on Anita Hill's coke can is okay. More specifically, five kings and queens rule that obese nation, since every player on Survivor knows you need a solid five to win the game. In true democratic fashion, a single swing vote or philosopher king is all that's needed to create or destroy shit. This gives SCROTUS actual power, unlike the cardboard cutouts that puddle-shaped Americans vote for. Originally envisioned by slave-owners as a form of IRL Internet court, SCROTUS has become like a Magic card run amok, leading to unforeseen consequences in the rulebook, such as the political realization of Plato's Philosopher King concept.
According to the Jewnited States of Americunts Constitution, the President is appointed by a body of nine old rich white men (sometimes women or black person when a liberal is president but still old and rich) who are kept alive long past the natural span of mortal years by the Black Arts. A vote of 5–4 is needed to pwn Al Gore.
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