GreatestJournal
GreatestJournal was an LiveJournal clone, using Bradfitz's open source code to create a similar website. For evil. GJ has some features that whiny LJers have asked for since they were introduced, such as 2,000 userpics and the ability to remove yourself from someone's friends list, but Brad has not caved to this pressure. As a result, GreatestJournal was populated by a whole bunch of stupid bitches.
Omgwtfevil?
Yes, that's right. GreatestJournal was started by 16 year old girls for 16 year old girls.
"More icons," the creators had begged on LJ. "Ok, but you have to pay," reasonably responded LJ staff after the required waiting period of 100 years. "No! We don't stay inside all day just to waste our money on a service we use for 20 hours at a time!" And so GreatestJournal was conceived, and the people who created it got omgkewliez usernames.
The creators of GreatestJournal were also role-players, so they decided to pretend like this fact had actual bearing on the decision to make the server. Thus, it became a mecca for psychos who think of themselves as celebrities (also known as "celebrity role-players"), and psychos with multiple personalities (also known as "role-players").
Also, usernames began to suddenly matter. That was news to several LJ transplants. Due to the flood of psychos, 16 year old girls, and fatties all of the good usernames were taken, some deleted and some never even used. Thus the purging war period began.
Purging War
The Purging War is an ever-losing battle constantly fought by the users of GreatestJournal, against the current moderators. When GreatestJournal did a purge - which rids the system of all deleted and occasionally even suspended usernames - you would not think it would matter as much as it did. But there were riots to get the best username, friends reserving names for friends, and other such mayhem. The bodies began to pile in the street and soon the stench of drama became unbearable.
Thus, the moderators decided and consequently announced that they would nevar evar be purging evar again because it "caused bugs in the system." Most likely they are simply trying to avoid any excess bloodshed.
The Church of GJology
50% of GreatestJournal users are evil scientologists who want to get in your cyber pants. 40% are simply batshit insane and have sparkly, oversharpened icons. 10% are simply batshit insane. All are prepared to give you their full name, address, password, and phone number if you are their e-BFF. Some will want to marry you even if you have never actually met, and you will most likely say yes because you are in e-love.
You will die within 7 days of first viewing the site.
GJ Popularity
GreatestJournal popularity can be defined in a nutshell as when you have over 40 friends and they all hate your guts, but say they love you to your face because you role-play such a fantastic homosexual Lord of the Rings cast member. Pun intended.
However, as you go deeper, you discover many other elements to GJ popularity, such as (in clean bullet points):
- Your username: If your username is the first or last name of the oversharpened or sparkly person in your icon, you are on the right track to becoming a fantastic human being.
- Your layout and icons: Because it's easy to be e-superficial.
- Amount of characters you play: And how homosexual they are and how much time you spend on them.
- Your interests: If one of them includes "giving out free role-play sex," you will be the most popular girl/boy/it!
- Being bitchy: If your opinion is controversial and/or if you steal graphics and/or if you kind of suck and/or if you are just plain psycho, expect at least 100 comments for every public entry you make. If you answered yes to all of those questions, hello, Brianne.
Avoiding GreatestJournal
Avoiding catching the GJ, also known as "the drama disease," can be done in the following easy steps:
- Ending your life.
- Ending your online life.
- Hiding under a rock, under a mountain, millions of miles under the earth's surface.
- Getting regular mental-health examinations.
The GreatestJournal Elites
The GJ Elites were a group of GJers who hang around shitlist, Divierto, and fuanon all day. They all had a love/hate relationship and are found using their own slang such as : "ily" "ty" "yw" "bb :*" "iawtc" "iawtp" "idawtc" "idawtp" "stfu" "gtfo" "-->" "irl" "fl" "tbh" etc etc.
They always got angry when someone calls one of them elite. They shoot back with the reply, "THERE IS NO ELITE! Stfu AND GTFO!"
Want to be a GJ ELITE? Here are some rules.
- Your user name cannot have numbers or underscores in it, or be imaginative in any way.
- You must have a generator layout.
- Your icons must only be bases.
- You must be on AOL or at least use AOL Instant Messenger.
- You must be friends with at least one other Retard.
- You cannot have junk in your user info.
- You must think you know correct grammar despite having the writing style of a baboon.
The original GJ Elites were members of shitlistanon. They included emcee (rapper, nephie), ziggy (mellor, sare), sungmin (vetiver, lochranza), benfolds, touristtrap (thegoldfinch, dupersessions), cumulonimbus, farout (monkey), hyz, and skibbereen. Half of them don't even use GJ anymore. BECAUSE THEY GOT LIVES.
Flame Cup
In 2006, GJ Elite Nephie and her friends created FlameCup, a direct rip-off of LJ's FlameCup. The community was a widespread success, mainly finding use in the GJ Elite crowd. After Shitlist's untimely death, the community began to shift focus to rating communities and divierto. The community had a revolving door of maintainers, including ~rapper, ~toadette, ~krumping, ~deathcab, ~cujo. The most notorious owner was ~hyz, who was given the community when no one else wanted it. ~hyz jumped shit and gave the community to ~shitlistanon, who promptly stopped updating. anons speculate that it was her plan to kill flamecup all along.
In November 2007, a new community opened up to take the place of FlameCup since ~shitlistanon stopped updating. So far, it's going smoothly.
Apocalypse
As of December 9th 2007 GJ is currently in an error state. The creator and "maintainer" system has made a post directing new users to another site. GJ has also went from 2,000 icons to 100 to the amazing number of...10, and it takes 10 minutes to load the site. Of course this only means one thing: Y2K GJ IS DYING!11 in communities all over gj there are constant posts about backing up entries, usernames, and remembering the good times. THE END IS NIGH.
Armageddon
On January 13, 2008, system posted this which caused many flames and lulz from GJ members, especially people with over 9000 role playing journals. There were allegations of stolen money all around and a flood of lolcat pictures ensued, along with general faggotry. System then went apeshit and lowered the icon number to 5.
Chicken Little Syndrome
On January 13, 2008, roughly nine hours, three refugee communities on Livejournal, and lots and lots of unnecessary panic later, Greatestjournal.com was revived, appearing to be fully functional, and leaving GJ users screaming WTF. As usual, the GJ'ers fearless leader, System, declined to comment.
The Great, Greatestjournal Diaspora
TBA tmrw on GJ, by our fearless leader, system.
Most of the GreatestJournal users migrated to InsaneJournal. lol, fail.
Post-Apocalyptic Times
On February 6, 2009, after a year and a half of lulz, system has finally entered the presidential nuke-codes and flipped the switch. Former GJ users (who haven't went outside since GJ sharted) currently house their multiple personalities in a similarly styled journaling site, aptly named InsaneJournal. A new breed of socially inept role players have mutated out of the fog of bio-hazard and fail, which resulted from the GJ apocalypse.
R.I.P.
See Also
External Links
- GreatestJournal.com
- Shitlist A ranting community in theory, but mainly for those kids who hate their moms and think that they're poor when they're upper-middle class. Yeah, those kids.
- Howmuchyousuck Also HMYS.
- Fuanon For all your anonymous needs.
- Divierto For all your miscellaneous needs.
- Equations For all the uglies.
gjflame Flames!
NONE OF THIS SHIT WORKS ANYMORE!
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