High Functioning Autism

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Jump to navigation Jump to search
Bent micropenis is a common symptome of HFA

High Functioning Autism is a condition that does not exist and has never been recognized by the American Psychiatric Association. Its most frequent sufferers are speshul snowflakes who believe their mental disorder grants them super powers greater than the much sought after Asperger's Syndrome. HFA shares many similarities with 'tism except it requires a lengthy process of self-diagnosis and being so inept at life that the only explanation (aside from being a lazy fuckass) is it JUST couldn't be their fault. Luckily, HFA is immensely useful in explaining away all of your faults while still implying you are secretly the smartest person ever! Depending on the day of the week and who is laughing at them for being miserable failures the symptoms of HFA can drastically change. It simultaneously removes the subject's ability to utilize social skills while in no way impacting them in any measurable way the next, and how dare you try to deny their life of struggle. Other symptoms include "genius" level intellect in every topic not useful for getting a job or pursuing a career, staying up all night playing video games, and being as unproductive as possible. Basically it's Aspie except instead of having even a slightly negative impact on a person's life, it has none.
To Summarize: HFA is the final evolution of lego cluster personality disorder. A convenient excuse for the fat dumpster fire that is the life of a fucking dork by claiming their addiction to Wikipedia and avoiding hygiene makes them the smartest nerd in the room, despite their lack of success doing anything important.

Famous Individuals Afflicted with HFA

[Give $500 PlzOpen Up to Us]
High Functioning Autism is part of a series on E-psychiatry
Mental illness & Disorders

AcrotomophiliaAddictAgoraphobiaAlcoholicAlexis Pilkington SyndromeAlzheimer'sAnorexiaAntisocial personality disorderAnthropophobiaAngstAttention Deficit Hyperactivity DisorderAttention Deficit Hyperactivity DisorderAsperger's SyndromeAsperger's SyndromeBimboficationBipolarBorderline personality disorderBug ChasingEating disorderCognitive dissonanceDeep thinkerDepressionDick ImpalementRetardDyslexiaEating disorderFactitious disorderFake SchizophreniaFauxlimiaFeminismGender dysphoriaGirl on the Internet SyndromeHeterophobiaHero ComplexHFAHistrionic Personality DisorderHutchence's SyndromeHyperbolimiaInadequacyInconsistent personality disorderInsanityLiberal Butthurt SyndromeLiberalismLow Self-esteem"Missing White Woman Syndrome"Multiple personality disorderNapoleon ComplexNarcissistic personality disorderNeurotypicalObsessive Compulsive DisorderParanoiaParanoid personality disorderPeter Pan SyndromePost-Traumatic Stress DisorderPsychopathyPyromaniaRetardSchizophreniaSeasonal Affective DisorderSelf-diagnosisSelf InjurySexsomniaSickfuckerySociopathySocial anxiety disorderSpecial Snowflake SyndromeTerminological percipience disorderTrolling Induced Transsexuality SyndromeTulpaUnrealistic expectationsVictim complex

Fetishes:

AcrotomophiliaAquaphiliaArborphiliaAudiophiliaTransgenderBalloon FetishBestialityCarmen Electra complexCross DressingDollfiliaRoman ShowerEmosexualityEproctophiliaFatty Fetish (Female Fat Admirer) • FetishismFoot FetishFurniture PornFurrismGoo girlGuroHeterosexualHomophiliaInflation FetishJapanophiliaJungle FeverLesbian pedophiliaLotion PlayMacrophilePregnophileMechanophiliaMpregNecrophiliaObjectophiliaOedipial ComplexParaphiliaPedophiliaPlushiePregnant LoliPregnophiliaQuicksand FetishRangerphileSpectrophiliaStatuephiliaTrichophiliaVorarephiliaWet and Messy FetishismWetlookXenophiliaYellow feverBestiality

E-Psychosis:

Chronic Troll SyndromeDeletionismE-goE-PsychiatristE-PsychiatryeTDHivemindI-DosingI have a 140 IQIRC DiseaseImaginary girlfriendInternet Disease & Internet Disease ChartInternet poverty delusionsInternet RehabInternet troll personality disorderMega ultra super geniusNerdy Fandom Gateway TheorySex by associationLulz-BlindnessWikipedia's Greatest Hits Diseases

Experiments:

ask.fmBrainwashingHypnosisMilgram Experiment$cientologyThe Stanford Prison ExperimentThe Hivemind Corollary

Sites:

Above Top Secret/b/Bodies Under SiegeCYOCChatrouletteDefense Industries OrganizationDeekerFoolQuest.comInkBunnyNeuticles.comPsyke.orgWarpMyMind.com

See also:

American Psychiatric AssociationAngerASMRChild abuseConscienceDreamsDSMElan SchoolEnlightenmentIntelligenceLobotomyMary BellPsychiatristySerial KillersTake the meat bridgeThe Law of ConformityTrigger Warning