Stephen Paddock
|
 NORTH AMERICAN CHAMPION! GGWP!
|
|
|
|
please click here and slowly scroll down to the bottom of the page. |
| |
|---|---|
| Abu Abdul Barr al-Amriki | |
| Born | April 9, 1953 |
| Died | October 1, 2017 (aged 64) |
| Nationality: | Americunts 
|
| Occupation | Music critic |
| Highscore | Killed |
| Top 50? | 2nd  (Americas: 1st!!)
|
| Style | FPS sniper mode |
| An hero? | .38 snubnosed mouthwash |
| Motive(s) | Jihad, Las Vegas syndrome |
Stephen Craig Paddock☪ (a.k.a. Abu Abdul Barr al-Amriki and Captain Paddock) was a veritable God among men who had a life's worth of experience at the age of 64 as a licensed pilot, gambler, Imam, hunter, and professional geriatric. On October 1, 2017, after 9 months of a rather uneventful year, Stephen said, "Gosh darn it!" and decided to put his mad skillz to the test with one last gamble as he ordered the degenerate youth of Las Vegas to get the fuck off his lawn in style.
Stephen, a literal die-hard fan of country music, smashed open the windows in his suite in the Mandalay Bay Resort and Casino and rained lead on a crowd of 22,000 stupid posers attending the Route 91 Harvest, a so-called "country music" festival that Stephen believed was brutally raping the genre he loved so dearly.
With 10 points in agility and perception, this Courier of Death delivered swift justice to the Fallout strip as he racked up a whopping 60 kills and 422 injuries (all under 12 minutes!!) before being interrupted and finally turning the gun on himself. Stevie committed the deadliest mass shooting by a lone gunman (or any gunmen for that matter) in US history; his super effective technique, the Mandalay Bay Spray and Pray, is hailed by critics as the "best thing to happen in Vegas since The Hangover."
The Mission
This fine gentleman of the ripe age of 64 had gone to Sin City to drink and gamble away his problems as usual. Like any other decent Las Vegas individual, Stephen checked into the 32nd floor of the Mandalay Bay with 20 suitcases full of weapons and ammunition without security noticing him. The house took him in due to his gambling addiction; little did they know that he would exact revenge for taking every penny.
Upon hearing the first notes of Jason Aldean's crap tunes coming from outside, Stephen's plan immediately formulated, prompting him to smash open two windows, retrieve one of the dozens of rifles he happened to bring with him, take aim, and launch metal hail onto the unsuspecting ear-rapists congregated below.
Volley after volley, magazine after magazine, Stephen cut down large swathes of the enemy formation, making him feel that much better about himself. Soon the pigs located this musical maestro and were about to rush in to get his autograph, but as usual they were too slow because he did their job for them. When he completed his mission, Stephen Paddock let out one last joyful tear as he shed himself from his mortal coil and ascended to the great casino in the sky.
Assault Plan
Walkthrough
- Step 1 - Invest in real estate and become rich
- Step 2 - Learn your gun rights and laws even though you're about to murder dozens
- Step 3 - Buy a small army's worth of guns with your money
- Step 4 - Get ammo and cameras and shit
- Step 5 - Rent out a room in a tower (optional: luxury hotel)
- Step 6 - Wait for massive gathering of people
- Step 7 - UNLEASH HELLFIRE UPON THE SHEEPLE (optional: suicide after)
- Step 8 - Ignite further shitstorm via political meltdown
- Step 9 - ????
- PROFIT!!!!!
Guns. Lots of guns.
-
The ATF's worst nightmare.
-
-
-
If only he was kind enough to loan one to Asa Coon...
-
..or Randy Robert Stair.
Loadout
| Class Setup | |
|---|---|
| Item | Accessories/Bonus |
|
|
 |
|
 |
|
 |
|
 |
|
 |
|
Reactions
It has been posited that one mistake Stephen made in his execution of the attack was that he did not leave behind any written manifesto or parting message, although some argue that this cliffhanger only adds an extra factor of lulz. The reactions from the old media✡ and politicians, much like every other mass shooting, was the same. Paddock's profile didn't meet the typical loner or mental illness stereotype of a murderer, but they did find out that his father, Benjamin Paddock, was a bank robber on the Party Van's "Top Ten Most Wanted Fugitives" and was reportedly "psychopathic" and "suicidal." Wikipedia wanted to delete the separate article on Paddock and wanted it to be a part of the shooting article itself, even though he is clearly notable due to beating the American high score by a long mile. A lot of people pulled the race card and said that since he's white, police or the news wouldn't label him as a terrorist due to not being a raghead. But his motive, whether it was religious, political, or musical, is still unknown.
Out of panic (as if that's not a surprise already), everybody started spreading false ass information. People confused Paddock with the ex-husband of the girlfriend he was with at the time, noting the fact that he was a Liberalism who liked Rachel Maddow and was anti-Donald Trump.
As usual, a butthurt Hillary Twitter loudmouth named Greg Morelli weighed in on the situation thusly:
Morelli owned Max's Deli in Highland Park along with his father and brother until some busybodies improved the deli's Facebook page by adding photoshopped images of Morelli fapping over the victims. Turns out that Greg had only recently displayed his butthurt over Hillary's stunning loss with a jaunty cartoon of Nazi bagels and a depiction of an alt-right matzo ball which enraged the community enough that the local Max Weisenthal center agreed to help with damage control by hosting a frank discussion of the behavior, at which an unrepentant Greg behaved like an ass. After the Vegas tweet, the Center had this to say of Greg Morelli:
Without the cover of the Wiesenthal Center, and with their Yelp.com accumulating a mountain of complaints, the family allegedly fired him.
Aliases
- Stevie Wonder Makes the Guns Thunder
- Paddy The Sniper Daddy
- Click-Clack Paddywack
- Havok with Paddock
- "Swift like a Haddock" Paddock
- Daddy Paddy Wacker
- Stephen "bolted from the" Paddock
- Stephen 'sLays in Vegas' Paddock
- Stephen "You're Gonna be grievin'" Paddock
- Stephen "I've Fucking had it" Paddock
- Stephen lvl 32 Warddock
- Steve "You Can't Leave" Paddock
- Stephen "Stop you Breathin'" Paddock
- Stephen "Guns Unsheathin'" Paddock
- Lord Paddock from Havok
- Lvl 32 Boss Battle
- Mandalay Bay Security Pentester
- Stephen "Bushmaster" Paddock
- Mr. 586
- The 4 Minute Decimator
- Mr. M240
- Stephen "Oxygen Depletin" Paddock
- Stephen "Give me a fucking reason" Paddock
- Stephen The Heathen
- Stephen The Smoking Gun
- Stephen "Sending Yanks to St.Peter from 300 Meters" Paddock
- Stephen "Take Your Life with an Asian Wife" Paddock
Family Members
- Eric Paddock - Steve's twin brother. The 1%. A fucking freeloader who retired just to leech off his brother's success while eating 1000$ COMPED sushi everyday. He also thinks only poor people works at taco bell (inb4 the butthurt of every poor niggers and the 99%).
- Patrick Paddock - who?
- Bruce Paddock - FUCKING PEDOPHILE HOLYSHIT
- Benjamin Hoskins Paddock - The Father. A fucking bank robber and a con man. He is also on the top ten FBI most wanted list who escape jails after jails like he was the protagonist of Shawshank's Redemption. Died and gave birth to 4 little jack off with one of them being Steven, chosen of the dark gods. The rest are either a pedophile, a freeloader sushi enthusiast and a nobody.
- Mom Paddock - Steve made her wealthy.
- Peggy Paddock - Stephen's EX-wife. Two divorced for more than 27 years ago after a six-year marriage and had no childrens. Currently living in Cerritos, California.
Gallery
-
When you see it...
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
Stevie back in 1964
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
Whoops!
Scrubbed story
-
Youtube solves the case
-
Court-admissible expert testimony
-
You go, sister!
-
What the Jew really thinks
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
Videos
|
Critics' Review
| Kill count: | 60/20 Deadliest OAP since Derrick Bird |
|---|---|
| Accuracy: | 4/20 Thought he could accurately aim from the top of a hotel |
| Style: | 20/20 Smuggling in 23 rifles and putting them to good use |
| Butthurt: | 20/20 Reignited gun control debate and white privilege |
| Bonus: | 20/20 An Hero + Deadliest mass shooting in modern US history |
Thank you, Stephen, for proving that a terrible kill-to-injury ratio is irrelevant when you have godly firepower
Wanted Level:
National Guard
Epilogue: Borderline Bar & Grill College Country Night!
On November 7, 2018, a year after Paddock gave his honest musical opinion upon country music fans, another fine gentleman—Ian David Long (who lived with his mom, lol)—walked into a country bar and took another 12 lives. One of those killed was a Navy veteran who survived Paddock's wrath in Las Vegas. Many other attendees had also survived the massacre, leading many to question how these lucky few managed to beat the house odds. In response to this mass shooting, a Change.org petition was launched to prohibit the playing of country music indefinitely.
See Also
- Pulse Nightclub Massacre & Cho Seung-Hui - defeated former US champions
- Anders Behring Breivik - Only one he failed to beat
- Marjory Stoneman Douglas School Shooting - random faggot who tried to recreate Stephen's feat 4 months later at his school; failed considerably
- Brenton Tarrant - 2019 Aussie contender who (unsuccessfully, but nearly) challenged Stephen's highscore
- Mass Shooting - the overused IRL dead meme that Stevie revived and took to a whole new level
- Gun control - prepare for the great debate to be reignited with no positive outcome
- Donald Trump - Republican president during the occurrence of the mass shooting, and thus personally responsible (if you're libtard)
- Bernie Sanders - Liberalism senator during the occurrence of the mass shooting, and thus personally responsible (if you're conservadick)
- 9/11
External Links
- Official Las Vegas Metropolitan Police Department Investigative Report FULL
- His married girlfriend
- SICK: 4Chan Having Fun with Las Vegas Massacre
2017 Las Vegas shooting at Know Your Meme- Las Vegas shooting at Mandalay Bay Casino hotel
- Who was Stephen Paddock? Las Vegas shooter 'not an avid gun guy'
- Stephen Paddock's father launched violent attack in Las Vegas decades ago
- He got mindfucked by diazepam, Holy Shit!
- Not Stephen Paddock, but pretty close (and Paddock didn't have a goddamn James Bond car that could drive under water) (Archived: 1
2)
|
Spree/One-time Killers: |
Aaron Alexis • Adam Lanza • Alex Hribal • Alyssa Bustamante • Audrey Hale • Bruce Jeffrey Pardo • Casey Anthony • Cho Seung-Hui • Dylan Klebold • Dylann Storm Roof • Eric Harris • Gerry McCann • James Holmes • Jared Lee Loughner • Jason Rodriguez • Jeff Weise • Jiverly Voong • Joe Stack • Josef Fritzl • Laaiti Ekenstéen • Mark Essex • Martin Bryant • Matthew de Grood • Matthew Murray • Matti Saari • Maurice Clemmons • Pekka-Eric Auvinen • Raoul Moat • Richard Speck • Robert Hawkins • Tim Kretschmer • TJ Lane • Tyler Peterson • Wade Michael Page • Woo Bum-kon |
|---|---|---|
| Career/Serial Killers: |
Academy Maniacs • Adolf Hitler • Charles Manson • Chris Benoit • W • Jack the Ripper • Jeffrey Dahmer • Mao Zedong • Richard "The Iceman" Kuklinski • Ted Bundy | |
| Terrorists: |
Al Qaeda • Anders Behring Breivik • Anderson Lee Aldrich • Anton Lundin Pettersson • Dzhokhar Tsarnaev • Elliot Rodger • George Sodini • Mark Essex • Fort Hood • Osama bin Laden • Tamerlan Tsarnaev • Unabomber | |
| See also: |
Antisocial personality disorder • Jews • Murder • Paranoid personality disorder • Pittsburgh Paint Job • Police Brutality • Sick fuck |
| Locus in quo: |
Aaron Howard 🔫 Capital Gazette Shooting 🔫 Chris Dorner 🔫 Christchurch mosque attacks 🔫 Aurora Theatre Shooting 🔫 Ian David Long 🔫 Connor Betts 🔫 El Paso Walmart Shooting 🔫 Elliot Rodger 🔫 Gilroy Garlic Festival Shooting 🔫 Jacksonville Shooting 🔫 Kyle Rittenhouse 🔫 Marjory Stoneman Douglas School Shooting 🔫 Pulse Nightclub Massacre 🔫 Randy Robert Stair 🔫 San Bernardino Shooting 🔫 ISIS Paris Attack 13-11 🔫 Sandy Hook Elementary Massacre 🔫 Santa Fe High School Shooting 🔫 Shoahdown at the Synagogue of Doom 🔫 Las Vegas shooting 🔫 Devin Patrick Kelley 🔫 Chris Harper-Mercer 🔫 DeWayne Craddock 🔫 Nasim Aghdam 🔫 |
|---|---|
| Supporters |
Barack Obama 🔫 Christian 🔫 Concerned Mothers 🔫 Liberalism 🔫 Dianne Feinstein 🔫 Government 🔫 The Kennedys 🔫 Kurt Eichenbald 🔫 Faggot 🔫 Liberalism 🔫 Michael Bloomberg 🔫 Jews 🔫 SJWs 🔫 Sensitive people 🔫 Tara Strong 🔫 Trayvon Martin 🔫 Quinton Reviews |
| Main ideas: |
Assault rifle 🔫 Gun 🔫 Gun control 🔫 Murder 🔫 Rachelle Waterman 🔫 Bomb 🔫 Mass Shooting 🔫 School Shooting 🔫 |
| Haters gonna hate: | |
| Acts of revenge: |
Boston Marathon Bombing 🔫 ISIS Paris Attack 13-11 🔫 Ariana Grande Massacre 🔫 London Bridge Attack 2017 🔫 Capital Gazette Shooting |
| Objectors: |
Charlton Heston 🔫 Aurora Theatre Shooting 🔫 Bullet to the Head of the NRA 🔫 Osama bin Laden 🔫 Republican 🔫 People planning a massacre 🔫 |
| Pre-2012 Gun Massacres |
LOLumbine 🔫 École Polytechnique 🔫 Dawson College 🔫 Virginia Tech Massacre 🔫 Austin, Texas 🔫 NIU Valentine's Day Massacre 🔫 Hungerford Massacre 🔫 Anders Behring Breivik |
| Stephen Paddock is part of a series on Terrorists 
|
Big Players Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi
• Anders Behring Breivik
• Antifa
• Australians
• Barack Obama
• Black Lives Matter
• Cho Seung-Hui
• Death to Traitors, Freedom for Britain
• DisruptJ20
• 3Guys1Hammer
• George Soros
• George W. Bush
• Grog
• Jack Gilbert Graham
• John Walker Lindh
• Nghtmrchld26
• Michael Moore
• Mohamed Abdulaziz Rashid Saeed-Alim
• Islam
• Osama bin Laden
• Philip Manshaus
• Robert Hawkins
• Sharjah Ruler
• Sam Hyde
• Pekka-Eric Auvinen
• The Unabrower
• Timothy McVeigh
• Unabomber Terrorist Groups, Beliefs and Causes Sand niggers
• Uncyclopedia
• The Binghamton Tet Offensive
• Iran
• Ireland
• Islam
• Isræl
• Pakis
• Palestine
• Sudan Terrorist Actions American Airlines Flight 63 • ATHF Terrorist Attack • Ariana Grande Massacre • Beheading videos • The Binghamton Tet Offensive • BLMKidnapping • Boston Marathon Bombing • Breitscheidplatz • LOLumbine • Dallas Sniper Attacks • Delaware State University Shooting • Gaza War • Halle synagogue shooting • Khalid Masood's Westminster motor massacre • London Bridge Attack 2017 • Mass Shooting • Narcovideos • Nice Truck Attack 2016 • Nitroglycerin • Occupy Wall Street • Timothy McVeigh • ISIS Paris Attack 13-11 • Pittsburgh Paint Job • Pulse Nightclub Massacre • Police Brutality • Ramadan Van Man • Reina Nightclub Massacre • VTech • Waco • 9/11 |
|---|
| Featured article October 3 & 4, 2017 | ||
| Preceded by 4chan fgt hat day |
Stephen Paddock | Succeeded by ComicsGate |
| Featured article October 13 & 14, 2018 | ||
| Preceded by Kurt Eichenbald |
Stephen Paddock | Succeeded by Batman |
| Featured article August 27 and 28, 2022 | ||
| Preceded by Kiwi Farms |
Stephen Paddock | Succeeded by Keffals |